condom mile

The desperate half-mile sprint a man makes to a local convenience store when he desperately wants sex, has a partner, but isn't willing to risk spawning a crotch goblin. Upon arriving back with condoms, the Condom Mile is complete

Sarah: "Y'know, I was really disappointed I couldn't sleep with Richie at that party last night..."
Jessica: "You should've just had him make the Condom Mile."

by Turtle-Cakes April 5, 2024

Condom Conundrum

When you know that shit doesn’t feel the same with one, but you’ve slipped one past the goalie in the past and you can’t tell her the last time you got your shit tested so she’s super gay about it and makes you wear a condom.

"When was the last time you got tested?"
"No clue."
"And you're already a dad?"
"Yes."
"Looks like we go a condom conundrum on our hands here."

by Old Bae December 3, 2017

Coffee condom

The sleeve that goes on a steaming hot coffee (often from a drive thru) so you can hold it without burning your hand.

May I have a coffee condom for the cup to keep from burning my hands please?

by Momma D6 February 20, 2018

Kiddie Condom

A condom made of a plastic bag as a condom on their finger to be used for fingering.

Girl: Did you bring a kiddie condom?
Boy: Yeah. Open wide.

by gbabbiii December 22, 2010

Trojan Condom

When two people having sex cum so much the condom pops

"Yo Dan, Did you hear about Richards trojan condom last night?"

by urban dick dick 6 9 March 25, 2022

Condom xl

An extra large condom that’s really big

Hey my condom xl broke while I was inside my gurl now I’m a father das right

by Bootymaster696969696969 August 8, 2019

condom

what your parents,obviously,did not use

-How did this shit came out

-Fuck you bitch, dat ain't mine.I used a CONDOM slut

by ya_mama_made_dat October 17, 2017