Wozzle Wank

When someone defecates onto a biscuit, then proceeds to ejaculate onto the same biscuit, before proceeding to smear it onto their face or consume it.

“Damian proceeded to wozzle wanked last night before passing out.”

“Giles left his wozzle wank on the side for all to see the next morning”

by OldFishBlower November 6, 2020

Wank Waves

The waves created whilst fapping in the bath. Often accompany a frequent rhythm of splash noises.

Person #1: “Made some big wank waves in that hotel bathroom last week”
Person #2: “ Damm bro bet the noise was extreme!”

by Terribletory123 March 12, 2022

Undercover Wank

When it's so cold in your bedroom, you have to keep the duvet on while you beat off

"Man, it was so cold last night, I had to have an undercover wank!"

by Eddiehimself November 26, 2014

Business wank

noun. A bout of masturbation conducted purely for practical reasons. It can be enjoyed, but that is not its purpose. It is done solely to necessarily relieve high stress, drain one's blue balls, or because the next opportunity to have one off the wrist could be far into the future.

"Yo, what took you so long?"

"Sorry, I've got dinner with my girlfriend's parents tonight, then we're all staying at this place with paper-thin walls and we can't bang later, so I had to have a quick business wank."

by burnard August 17, 2014

Wank Statement

The browsing history of someone who regularly visits web sites with the intent to plunder Percy the pink

After reviewing my wank statement I can see that I have made over 30 deposits this month.

I found your mum on line last week and if I just check my wank statement I can give you the web address.

by Ravey Davey Gravy March 6, 2018

Danger Wank

The act of pleasuring yourself screaming your parents name and finishing before they get to the room.

MOM!!!! Im danger wanking!

by Jakdasnake96 June 6, 2018

wank in the can

jacking off in a bathroom or porta potty

i almost got caught doing wank in the can at the gas station.

by nobody else here May 30, 2017