Shirt-reader

An obnoxious person who stands in front of you when you're in a rush and takes forever to read whatever whimsical graphic tee you happen to be wearing that day out loud to you (as if you didn't know what your fucking shirt said).

Neill: I was late to Biology the other day, and to make matters worse, some shirt-reader got in my way and took forever to read my Jesus shirt to me.
Kristy: Which one?
Neill: The one that says BRB.
Kristy: Douche.

by Fenix_451 November 22, 2009

Teleprompter Reader In Cheif

Barack Hussein Obama

I hope the Teleprompter Reader In Cheif figures out that Americans don't want him to keep going with his agenda before he spends another Trillion dollars he doesn't have.

by Dave4270 August 27, 2009

Uncle John's Bathroom Reader

A book published by Portable Press, containing random bits of trivia in different categories, ranging from easy read all the way to long read. Little tidbits usually at the bottom of the page or at the end of a topic. There are new books every year, and sometimes there are books in one huge category (e.g. sports), Plunges into... books, and even kids' books. Used to have its own institute and its own website.

Some Dude 1: "Hey, have you ever heard of Armchair Reader?"
Some Dude 2: "Hell no, I've only ever heard of Uncle John's Bathroom Reader."

by xxylvii July 25, 2021

Sargent Afghanistan Personal Message Code Reader:735546708653

Sargent Will's Personal Message: Tracking of the 863 Code on the area of 99,635,6531

Tracking of I.S.L.F on go in Brazil base .255.

Code: 74368GA
Signal: 440-4k
TJD: Sargent T. Arent

Commander Renege Personal Message: Will's if this gets out to the Soviets then know what to do
Location: Russia, ***,**,*****

Sargent Will's Personal Message: I understand and i will do everything in my power to not let this get out

2/23/12
6/14/16
8/29/20
12/24/21 Code Reader

Sargent Afghanistan Personal Message Code Reader:735546708653
01001011101001010101001010101010101010100010101010101010100100101010100101010110110010101001010101010101010100100101100101010101001001110100101001010110010101101010101010100101010110101011000
Code Reader Tag: 673,378,923

010011010110010101010101010110

by BigDaddyChode69 May 6, 2021

Dear reader.

I know Heatherly sent you to see this definition.

I'm watching you dear reader.

by Randommboiy November 29, 2022

sparx reader

If you thought bedrock learning was bad, buckle your seatbelts boy, because the satanic company that is sparx learning (the absolute fucking monsters that made the Guantánamo Bay torture device, sparx maths) released a website called sparx reader. sparx reader is a nightmare to consume more of the student's time that could be going into curing AIDS or burning down the Church of England (fuck them) and if a school decides to implement it at school, fuck them, and i hope all their staff get into a horrific car accident

guy 1: getting waterboarded is a nicer way to spend my evening than using sparx reader
guy 2: real

by schmahman May 27, 2024

Mind Reader

A Mind Reader is a person or machine that can tell what other people are thinking. Three things a mind reader should never do is, reveal their secrets, disrespect privacy, and gossip.

Josh: “Hey mind reader! How do u read minds? Tell me your ways!!”

Mind reader: “I shall not it is wrong for me to reveal my secrets.”

Josh: “I understand and respect that.”

by Oxford Dctnry August 16, 2019