Jewish Surprise

Circumcising a man while he has passed out drunk. He then wakes up with a jewish surprise.

Why am I speaking Yiddish, oh mosseltoff! I've been hit by a jewish surprise!

by El Gringo the third March 8, 2009

Jewish Kryptonite

Free ham.

A paradox created for a hungry Jew by a generous miscreant.

Jewish Kryptonite! Now what do I do? Oy vey!

by Salacious January 1, 2009

Jewish nose

A nose that most Jews have that is a bit hooked down and sometimes larger, though the size doesn't matter.

The only way I could tell he was Jewish was his jewish nose.

by I am smart like that hehehehe March 20, 2010

Jewish Bankroll

A wallet with only single dollar bills and loose change inside.

"Your wallet resembles one of a jewish bankroll, so afraid to part with your big bills, only singles."

"Why are you picking up pennies, are you gonna add to your jewish bankroll?"

by Peshotto October 2, 2007

jewish water

ordering a "water" at a fast food restaurant, only to fill it up with some other beverage of your choosing when no employees are looking. comes from the stereotype that jews are cheap, and would therefore partake in this activity.

mike: i'm hella thirsty, let's hit up captain d's man

tyrone: ok, shit, i only have a dollar, but i'm really thirsty too

mike: it's cool dude, let's just get jewish waters and then we'll have enough money to get food too!

by mike hunt96 December 25, 2009

jewish daywalker

The Jewish-daywalker is someone who is Jewish on the father's side vs on the mothers side . As Jewish laws says you are only Jewish if your it comes from the mother. Someone who is Jewish from the side of the father has all the power of being Jewish without the consequences be being fully Jewish.

Jewish-daywalker abilities include but are not limited to:
Eating pork

Getting a discount on the pork they just ate
Knowing the market price of pork

Write you a prescription for pork
Defend your right to eat pork

I thought the jewish people were not allowed to eat bacon. It's ok, he's a jewish daywalker .

by J.Daywalker April 4, 2016

Jewish longhorning

A Jewish Longhorn is when two male's shove there enormous noses up each other's assholes

Me and mr Greenburg proceeded Jewish Longhorning

by Pink_Cunt January 10, 2017