The sexual act in which a man puts 2 eggs in between a woman's breasts(while laying in bed) and then sit on them for a solid 2 - 5 hours with a heating lamp near by and the room temperature very high. Then when he gets up, they should be hot, goey, and sticky. He will then proceed to use this as lube for violent sex afterwards. Then, with some of the eggshells, he will proceed to scrape her nipples until they are a bloody pulp.
Me: Dude, im so nervous...
Friend: Whys that?
Me: Sally wants me to do a Texas Humpty-Dumpty Nipple Splitter....I don't think I can sit still for that long!
Friend: Don't worry you'll be fine bro!!
by Shank0potomis March 16, 2012
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DUMPTY HUMPTY BUMPTY RUMPTY AAAa
by Kirbo the man September 26, 2019
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Humptyness

1. Noun- same as Humptiness
Peace and Humptyness forever
by gerardiswiggidywack July 25, 2004
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kade humpty-dump truck

Someone named Kade who has a voluptuous lower end.
Kade- Hey dude.
Nick- Wow you have a big bottom, may I call you Kade Humpty-Dump Truck
by CrystalClearSight June 17, 2021
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humpty ass

My humpty ass forgot to save my paper and I lost it when my computer crashed.
by Taco Tea Co. May 12, 2006
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Humpty Dumpty

When a someone is humping someone from the behind, and then carefully proceeds to take just the biggest dump on them. And I mean Taco Bell levels of crap, straight on the body. This could be intentional, but is usually accidental
Dude, how was sex last night?

Bro, I totally gave her the Humpty Dumpty last night!
That was totally sick!
by Gayvid2006 January 12, 2022
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Humpty Dumpty

A man who is a player and an asshole
(He humps and dumps)
Jen: don’t date that Humpty Dumpty
by BoliviaCitrius May 09, 2021
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