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Alaskan Root Beer Float

Hello bakers, my name is Bitty Kembleford, and today I'll he making a special take on a summer classic: The Alaskan Root Beer Float.

Do you remember the first time you had a root beer float? I do. I must have been around 7 years old and we were visiting my grandparents in Phoenix, in the summer.

Have you ever been to Arizona in the summer? Must be why I find Sacramento so tolerable. Let's just say it's hot.

I still remember all of us greedy kids, still in our swim suits, having been cooling off in the pool all day, lined up in the kitchen, wide eyed as we watched my father pull the multicolored hankercheif out of his weenie and clap in joyful glee.

It was just last Tuesday, a year ago, that my divorce happened. Very tragic. Humorous as well.

I was a mess. I went to the store and bought vinegar, ketchup, licorice, root beer, cigarettes, and vanilla ice cream.

Fortunately, I didn't put all of that together (whew... heart attack avoided), but I did make a root beer float, one of the most classic memories of my childhood.

It seems like root beer floats have been following me everywhere. Even after dad got shot.
Now let's crack on, shall we?

I use the So Delicious Vanilla Bean Coconut Ice Cream and Virgil's Organic Root Beer for my Alaskan Root Beer Float.

Using your favorite ash tray, combine cigarettes, vinegar, and baking soda.

In a separate bowl, combine one cup of Vanilla Ice Cream, and a bottle of your Virgil's Organic Root Beer.

Heated on medium, take a pot full of boiling water, and butterscotch Jell-O Mix, and combine until the lumps of Jell-O are gone. Next, remove from heat, and add the previous ingredients. Refridgerate for two days.

After all the anxious waiting, remove your Root Beer Float from the fridge. Makes two servings (serve with ketchup).
by jules019 January 19, 2021
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Alaskan Trader Joe's

Noun

A theoretical store that doesn't exist but should.

The nearest Trader Joe's to Anchorage, Alaska is a 40 hour drive away.

Don't complain that you have to drive an hour to get to Trader Joe's. You have been spoiled.
Bring Trader Joe's to Alaska! We need an Alaskan Trader Joe's!
by S.J. Bafalto June 18, 2023
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Alaskan Lasagna

The act of having diarrhea on your girls pussy while she is on her period then sticking your Shlong in it then peeing in it from the inside
Oh babe im so horny can you give me an Alaskan Lasagna
by Johnny Sins's son November 22, 2021
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Alaskan Bud Dragon

When Tony Todd cums in a girls mouth and yells "bud i got aids" and the cum goes back out her nose making her an Alaskan Bud Dragon.
Tony gave her an Alaskan Bud Dragon
by rumblingsky June 16, 2021
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Alaskan Firedragon

When you forget the lube but you guys do anal anyway and your dick becomes red hot due to the friction.
"I left the lube but we still did anal my dick became an Alaskan Firedragon"
by Alaskan Fucker October 11, 2021
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Alaskan Clap of Fury

A singular clap of absolute power that can be done to cat or booty, feared by all who are not dominants of the night. It is commonley performed on a victim with a booty 2x their own size and is a singular clap that inflicts endless pleasure and brain damage including excessive drooling, twitching, and squirting.
That alaskan clap of fury i just pulled off blew her to mars.
by EBSpremium March 18, 2025
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alaskan wheelchair

Daubinski's signature sex move...You sit her down on a wheelchair and bang her with an ice dildo.
Bruh I just tried the alaskan wheelchair... bruh.
by Daubinski July 16, 2017
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