Jesus Penis

When any male has a tattoo of Jesus inscribed upon their penis in any location.

Done so that during penetration, the man can say to the woman. "Can you feel that? You have Jesus inside you."

Woman: "Oh, Jim! That feels fantastic!"
Jim: "I knew getting a Jesus Penis was a great idea. Doesn't sex always feel better when you've got Jesus inside you?"
Woman: "DAMN RIGHT IT DOES!"

by RaptorJesus666 December 5, 2009

Jumpin' Jesus on a Pogo Stick

Exclamation of disbelief.

Anyway, 10:30, the other night, I go out in my yard, and there's
the Worker kid, looking up in the tree. I say, "What are
you looking for?" He says "I'm looking for my burrow owl."
I say, "Jumping Jesus on a Pogo Stick. Everybody knows
where the burrow owl lives. In a hole. In the ground. Why the hell do you
think they call it a burrow owl, anyway?"

by luser November 21, 2002

Jesus Desade

An Internet fiend, who trawls the web for the foulest, most disturbing and unsettling material it can provide. Should be approached with caution. Has the sexual appetite of a thousand men. A thousand debauched men.

Jesus Desade parked his bicycle in another man's orifice.
Jesus Desade will fuck you up!

by Disciple of Desade August 21, 2006

jesus walk

a long journey that can only be done by walking

bloke1: "sup man I had to do a jesus walk from seven sisters to ponders end"

bloke2: "raaah thats a propa jesus walk"

by slim keeno July 16, 2005

jesushole

Defines a virgin vagina, possessed by a female that engages in oral and/or anal sex.

After giving him a blowjob, Diane told Billy that he could do anything, he just couldn't put it in the jesushole.

by bigdogcasino February 10, 2010

Jumpin Jesus

a word to show your expression when someone scares you

ONLY AARON AND VERONICAS..NOT BENNYS.

Jumpin Jesus you scared the bejesus out of me!

by AT02202 December 18, 2006

pot Jesus

The guy who takes the blame so that others may smoke.

Damn, Greg totally played pot Jesus last night when the cops busted us.

by thephil November 8, 2007