Couch Lawyer

Someone who sits on the couch/chair/loveseat and only follows the case on TV, and bases their opinions on that case just by watching the TV.
You're such a couch lawyer, you base your opinions on what you see on TV.
by ZuNuKoo July 14, 2013
Get the Couch Lawyer mug.

Couch Pickle

A half eaten pickle found in a couch.
I found a couch pickle it is a little dry, but still pretty good.
by Jesse1432 March 05, 2021
Get the Couch Pickle mug.

Couch Fire

The great American ceremony of retiring a couch.

Step 1 - take couch to wilderness, bring plenty of beer
Step 2 - start bonfire - get smashed - sit on couch with friends and reminisce.
Step 3 - when well smashed and bonfire needs more fuel, add couch to fire.
Billy - Hey Sally, should we reupholster this thing?

Sally - No Billy ... It's time for a couch fire.
by Mitchell Iz June 09, 2023
Get the Couch Fire mug.

Couch Viking

Typically these people are out of shape, all bark no bite, and they spend too much time online as a keyboard warrior ready to go to Valhalla after dying in a video game battle. They may be neo nazis, they may be incels, they may be 4chan users, etc... Some couch vikings love spiritual warfare because it's the only type of warfare you can do while sitting on your ass.
If you're going to be Viking, don't be a Couch Viking
by Temiz August 14, 2023
Get the Couch Viking mug.

couch dolphin

A guy who has sex with couches, but also likes to fantasize about women having sex with dolphins and share it on social media. Person who has sex with a couch and also would like to have sex with a dolphin, or both at the same time.
After JD Vance had sex with a sofa, he immediately searched the internet for porpoise porn, he's such a couch dolphin!
by effdot July 26, 2024
Get the couch dolphin mug.

couch dolphin

1. (noun) A colloquial name for the Indo-Appalachian right-finned porpoise, usually found gesticulating betwixt couch cushions very racistly. Swims to the very far right and has a parasitic relationship with the “greatest” and whitest of sharks, when convenient.

2. (noun) A person who has intimate relations with an upholstered sitting apparatus, while they are watching ‘Flipper’ reruns, ‘Zeus and Roxanne,’ etc. , because the concept of human connection perplexes them.
Well… that Jim Dave fellow turned out to be a real couch dolphin. Yikes. Is this why Cleveland had to get rid of Sea World?
by Judith Jetson Lightyear July 27, 2024
Get the couch dolphin mug.

couch dolphin

1. (noun) A colloquial name for the Indo-Appalachian right-finned porpoise, usually found gesticulating betwixt couch cushions very racistly. Swims to the very far right and has a parasitic relationship with the “greatest” and whitest of sharks, when convenient.

2. (noun) A person who has intimate relations with an upholstered sitting apparatus, while they are watching p0rnpoise, because the concept of true human connection perplexes them.
Well… that Jim Dave Vance fellow turned out to be a real, self-described couch dolphin. Yikes. Is this why Cleveland had to get rid of Sea World?
by Judith Jetson Lightyear July 27, 2024
Get the couch dolphin mug.