by Owen Joness September 14, 2021

The difference between cats and dogs-
Dog- Please fill my bowl, I'm beggin you, don't do this to me!
Dog owner- Shut the fuck up!
Cat- What's up? You got my food yet? Don't make me come back again before that bowl is full. If that bowl isn't full by the time I get back...
Cat owner- All right, all right god dammit, you're not the only one ready to eat you know?
Dog- Please fill my bowl, I'm beggin you, don't do this to me!
Dog owner- Shut the fuck up!
Cat- What's up? You got my food yet? Don't make me come back again before that bowl is full. If that bowl isn't full by the time I get back...
Cat owner- All right, all right god dammit, you're not the only one ready to eat you know?
by Solid Mantis November 17, 2020

by Mabbitman1174 August 22, 2023

Friend 1: “Yo boys, get your socks off. We are gonna have us a dog fight!”
Friend 2: “What!? No bro… put your dogs away. Not today!”
Friend 3: “Yo bro..you know it’s Tyler’s third year anniversary of finding out he has diabetes!”
Friend 1: “Sorry boys.. just thought I’d lighten up the mood.
Friend 2: “Well it’s a little fucked up that you’d even think that’s appropriate knowing Tyler’s toe been cut off THREE YEARS AGO!”
Friend 1: “Dude! It’s not my fault Tyler’s dog got loose from the FRICKEN DIABETES!”
Friend 3: “FRIEND 1! GTFO! NO MORE HANGIN ROUND OUR SIDE OF THE COURTYARD ANYMORE!”
Tyler: *wobbles up to Friend 1* “Ayo…friend 1… do you even know how it feels to lose a dog three ago… I HOPE YOU KNOW HOW IT FEELS ONE DAY! THE FEELING OF MISSING THE UPSETTING FEELING OF SLIDING A DOG INTO A NEWLY FOUND HOLE OF A SOCK!! BUT YOU CANT EVEN IMAGINE THE LOOK ON MY WIFES FACE EVERYONE MORNING KNOWING SHE MARRIED A MAN THAT LOST HIS DOG! more specifically at a three year mark… makes for a real nice divorce.. WHYY DIABETES! WHYYYYY *falls to knees*
Friend 2: “What!? No bro… put your dogs away. Not today!”
Friend 3: “Yo bro..you know it’s Tyler’s third year anniversary of finding out he has diabetes!”
Friend 1: “Sorry boys.. just thought I’d lighten up the mood.
Friend 2: “Well it’s a little fucked up that you’d even think that’s appropriate knowing Tyler’s toe been cut off THREE YEARS AGO!”
Friend 1: “Dude! It’s not my fault Tyler’s dog got loose from the FRICKEN DIABETES!”
Friend 3: “FRIEND 1! GTFO! NO MORE HANGIN ROUND OUR SIDE OF THE COURTYARD ANYMORE!”
Tyler: *wobbles up to Friend 1* “Ayo…friend 1… do you even know how it feels to lose a dog three ago… I HOPE YOU KNOW HOW IT FEELS ONE DAY! THE FEELING OF MISSING THE UPSETTING FEELING OF SLIDING A DOG INTO A NEWLY FOUND HOLE OF A SOCK!! BUT YOU CANT EVEN IMAGINE THE LOOK ON MY WIFES FACE EVERYONE MORNING KNOWING SHE MARRIED A MAN THAT LOST HIS DOG! more specifically at a three year mark… makes for a real nice divorce.. WHYY DIABETES! WHYYYYY *falls to knees*
by kylewarner June 3, 2022

by Downesy October 6, 2020

Chili dogging is the process of slicing one penis open like a hotdog bun and putting another inside. Then you put a third penis in a meat grinder and grind it up like ground beef, laying the ground penis on top of the penis hotdog. You then take a third, homeless penis and scrape the smegma off, then have it cum on top.
by Cumbungus November 5, 2020

by Gert McFadden January 6, 2021
