American Football

Americans speed running brain damage.

American Football: "Oh, you want to avoid the test on Monday? Just play some Football this weekend and get a little concussion."

by Denkire March 22, 2021

FOOTBALL

FOOTBALL IS THE MOST MANLIEST FUCKING SPORT EVER! EVERYTIME A PLAYER CATCHES A FOOTBALL, IT MAKES YOU SHIT YOUR PAAANTS! EVERY THURSDAY, SUNDAY AND EVEN MANLY MONDAY! THERE IS A NEW GAME IN THE ROUGH HOUSING BONANZA WE CALL FOOTBALL! AAAAAAAHHHHH, I FEEL THE ADRENALINE FROM JUST TALKING ABOUT FUCKING FOOTBALL! POP OPEN YOUR TOSTITOS AND BEERS MEN BECAUSE FOOTBALL IS THE SHIT!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

WOMEN CAN LIKE FOOTBALL TOO! UUUUUUUUUUUH YEEEEEEEEEEEAH!

FOOTBALLKING IS OUT!

MAN 1: HEY!
MAN 2: WHAT?!?
MAN 1: READY TO WATCH THE FOOTBALL GAME!
MAN 2: DAMN STRAIGHT!
MAN 1: WOOOOOOO-
MAN 2: WOOOOOOOOO
MAN 1: POP OPEN THOSE BUD LIGHTS!
MAN 2: OOOOOOOH SHIIIIIIIT!!!

by Mariachi_Lobster December 2, 2021

Fantasy Football Snake

Fantasy football snakes are the lowest of the low. They are the guys who take advantage of drunken transactions and trick first-year players into making questionable trades, all for the betterment of their team.

Snake traders usually begin the fantasy football season strong, but shortly enough karma catches them and their team begins to dismantle until they fall just shy of playoffs.

Victim: "Hey man! What do you think about this trade Yusef convinced me on? I'll give him Darren Waller for one of his defenses and the starting kicker for the Bengals! Pretty good trade right?!"

Bystander: " Are you kidding me? That is a horrible trade. Do NOT take that trade. Geez... Yusef is such a fantasy football snake. I bet he's lurking the waiver wire too for drunken mistakes. Unreal!!"

by Hectorino November 26, 2021

Chocolate Football

A bold and utterly outrageous move where one partner "hikes" a poop out their ass like a football, and the other partner attempts to "throw the pass" Bonus style points for form, a clean spiral, and enthusiastic touchdown celebrations afterward.

"Bro, last night she dared me to try the Chocolate Football, and let’s just say... I nailed the throw, but we need new sheets."

by Greyghost90 December 12, 2024

I love you more than football

This is the moment where yk that he is in love with u

Bf: I love you more than football

by Hasegawa November 22, 2021

School Football

Where you do some absolute crunching tackles on the pitch at school, And halfway line shots, sucks being that kit in goal, One time I got tackled in the head and it was a fucking penalty to the other team and they sent it 60 feet over the bar, Brazilians

Are you ready to kill billy in School Football today?

by Lochstar! June 14, 2023

football (soccer)

a fun game where the lads bully year 7’s on the 4g

i like to play football (soccer)

by idektbf November 19, 2021