Canfield Presbyterian Church

One of the best churches in the World!

Random person: Hey what church do you go to?

Me: Canfield Presbyterian Church!

by Mr. Tall guy or Alex C June 13, 2023

Church-rat

A person who worships the Christian/Catholic faith to the point of practically living inside the church but at the same time not wanting to become a priest/nun.

Todd is such a Church-rat

by TheNightParade June 17, 2023

The church arch

The spread between a women’s fine cunt

I zuffled the church arch

by Cunted March 4, 2023

Church steeple

Used to describe the tight spread of thighs of a girl with a tight vagina

Check the spread on her, looks like a church steeple

by Favol March 5, 2023

church cervixes

What are available at da chapel's erectory as an after-sermon incentive for cranky hot-in-da-crotch teenage boys to attend said boring hypocritical speeches.

Clergy may actually have to resort to offering church CERVIXES to get da community's youths to come to the church SERVICES, if merely serving "ice cream sunday" portions fails to attract them.

by QuacksO January 28, 2023

church (h)usher

A Sunday-services attendant whose purported task is merely to see to da needs of da parishioners, but whose real job is to quell noisy stir-crazy children who would much rather be playing outside in da fresh air and sunshine, rather than being compelled to sit still and keep quiet inside a stuffy musty meeting-hall for two hours.

If churches would offer more-generous helpings of ice cream and/or an erectory as incentives to attend their boring sawdusty-dry sermons, there would likely be less need for church (h)ushers to be on hand to deal with crankily-impatient youngsters and teenage boys.

by QuacksO January 30, 2023

The π = 3 Church

When believers subscribe to the uncompromising view that any numbers or fractions mentioned in, or mathematical constants derived from, the Bible must be taken literally with zero room for approximation, adulteration, or subtraction.

Founded by a group of Bible literalists-turned-theomaticians, the π = 3 Church has so far failed to appeal to pre-believers and the converted, especially those who’re allergic to school or college math, despite regularly distributing free pies and pizzas to the poor in the community.

by Fasters February 12, 2023