grandpa's an asshole

A sick yet great song by Blink 182!

When you fucked grandpa did he tell you that he loved you
Did he hold you till the sun did rise
and did he look into your eyes
and ask you to felate him
and stick a finger or two in his ass

He seems like a total asshole
Grandpa is a total fucking asshole
Who would ever want a dirty greasy finger in his ass
he rubs his dick in broken glass

when you fucked grandpa did he kiss you soft and tender
did he tie your hands behind your head
and was it on your mother's bed

and this is stupid man! I can't believe you'd have sex with your own grandfather. I mean you guys are related! Whats he gonna do, take out his false teeth and just leave them on the side of your bed? Man, he likes to fuck you up the bottom, and grandma would come in and watch, and masturbate, and cum all over the place, and this is stupid! I hate you all! I'm not even gonna have sex with my mom tonight! Man, this is stupid! I hate you!

by Lizzy March 19, 2005

Asshole Questions

1. A question that you ask to piss somone off

2. A question that only an asshole would ask

Aaron: "Jason, where's that email that pissed you off? Can I hit on your sister? What about your Mom? Does your wife still go down on you? Hey, what do you think Angelina is going to name her next foreign baby?"

Jason: "I can't take it anymore!! Stop asking me these asshole questions!!!"

by ClevelandDan November 18, 2009

assholedach

a physician that dicks around with nurses and thinks he is the shit.

that surgeon is banging that new nurse... hes an assholedach

by cep79 January 11, 2012

Asshole Hangover

The shitty feeling you get after being an uncalled for asshole the night before.

"Damn, I treated my friends like shit for no reason, what the fuck was I thinking?"
"That's a wicked asshole hangover you got there. Better go fix it"

by Kazokone March 11, 2012

Asshole Penetration

when a dick comes in and out of the asshole. OR when the dick enters the asshole at a very fast rate.

hey Kimberly i could really use some asshole penetration right now because im really horney.

by theassholepenetrator May 14, 2012

Asshole Optimism

When someone tries to put an optimistic spin on an unfotmunate situation, but has a sarcastic intent, and ends up subtly coming off as an asshole.

"It's cool that you have no car like everyone else," said Lucas, "now you can have fun riding your bike everywhere." In a show of asshole optimism.

by doktorj March 8, 2014

Asshole Recovery Period

The lag time after a shit in which you're unable to sit down. Not to be confused with Post Shit Syndrome.

Rick had an hour long asshole recovery period after downing 2 foot long chilli cheese dogs.

by TesticularTorsion September 2, 2014