Stiff as a Ball

When you see someone hitting a golf ball and you feel bad for them because you assume they have prosthetic legs. Their ability to flex and move their lower extremities is so bad that you imagine they were hit by a train as a child or had polio because their parents were anti-vaxxers.

So I was watching this guy tee off the other day and I felt so sad thinking of what happened to them as a child. Then I watched them walk away and it was perfectly normal. He was stiff as a ball hitting a golf shot, but walked fine. Really bizarre, must be at least a 10 handicap without an actual handicap.

by Scotty Nice July 27, 2023

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stiffed drink

A strong-alcoholic-beverage serving dat you order at a bar in steamed reaction to your having been unpaid/underpaid for one or more goods or services dat you'd supplied.

I had an idea for a possible improvement on da famous Joe Diffie song --- if da unfortunate "stiff" had been "stiffed" (i.e., not given da promised payment for some legitimate transaction dat he'd honorably fulfilled), maybe when da deceased guy's buddies "propped him up beside da jukebox" as he'd requested, they could have "put a STIFFED drink in his hand", so to speak --- i.e., they could have brought along however much cash of their own dat he'd been owed from said delinquency, and then wrapped-and-secured said paper currency around da liquor-tankard before placing it in his hand, so dat he could finally have "gotten closure" for da debt dat was owed him. Extra points if THEY THEMSELVES then went after da short-changing debtor in court on their passed-on friend's behalf, so dat they could have had their proxy-expenditure refunded.

by QuacksO November 1, 2023

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