tortoise pigeons

the humorous name for the fake Yeezy Boost 350 Turtle Doves

- Damn, I got scammed for the yeezys
- Shit man, you got the tortoise pigeons

by ibelongwithmemes0000 April 29, 2017

stroke the tortoise

Refers to masturbating an uncircumcised penis.

Hey, I was with Kenneth last Friday and he asked his girlfriend if she wanted to stroke the tortoise; in front of everyone.

by deepthong November 22, 2022

tooter tortoise

a tortoise that farts out of control.

my tortoise is a tooter tortoise

by kidsareweird January 27, 2022

Whiskey Tortoise

Flaccid, impotent male genitals that result from consuming too much alcohol (esp. whiskey or bourbon).

"He got so drunk and later, in bed, he had a total whiskey tortoise. I lied and told him that it was fine and that all that mattered was being close to him."

by Tortoisemaster July 16, 2013

Roman Tortoise

A version of docking in which one participant wears a condom (for safety or other reasons).

George is just getting to know Rocco and doesn't feel comfortable docking with him without a condom and prefers the Roman Tortoise method

by M-Tip November 16, 2021

Tortoiseitis

Slower than fuck. A very slow person.

It takes that bitch forever to put her makeup on she has tortoiseitis.

by Mike Hawksbigger January 31, 2023

Roller skating tortoise

When the golden brown tortoise appears without announcement. Leading to shit yourself issues.

I was happily talking to this hot girl and the roller skating tortoise arrived

by Stenhousemuir nill February 26, 2022