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cook your own goose

To bring something upon yourself.
Aw, Kelsey, way to cook your own goose! All the vodka from last night gave you a terrible hangover.

Wow, Jim really cooked his own goose when he barebacked the Asian hooker on a trip to Tokyo. He got AIDS!
by millionsofbrazilians June 1, 2010
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cook the books

(v.) To exploit loopholes that allow for one's accounts to show less profits than actually exist, but allow for the figures to be changed for shareholder reports. Shows incorrect figures presented in a way that are unlikely to be questioned.
Claiming that six vans @ thirty grand each were bought for the business, when in actual fact the money went to a comapny located in switzerland owned by the board of directors, and the vans were toys costing next to nothing. The money (180,000 in your chosen currency) has gone to the directors as undeclared salary that is stored offshore.
by Kung-Fu Jesus July 22, 2004
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Related Words
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Chooky Style

Can be used to describe something either extremely lucky, non-skilful or extraordinarily out of character.
My Wife punched the stuffing out of another player (ice hockey), which was extremely out of character…such behaviour is known as Chooky Style. My wife (same wife) only ever seems to score goals using the bare minimum amount of skill…these goals are referred to as Chooky Style. My wife’s name is Chooky…
by chooky's bitch May 12, 2009
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Cookblocking

The act of using up ingredients in the fridge so another cannot cook what they intended to
Me: Jim where's the cheese?
Jim: Oh I ate it.
Me: God damn it Jim stop cookblocking me!
by Geekycoconut March 17, 2013
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cook my juice

A phrase meant to confuse others and stop or end an unwanted conversation, argument, or fight.
Brian: Hey baby, what are you up to tonight? Got a boyfriend?
Megan: Cook my juice.

Brian: ...wait what?
Megan: You heard me.
by YourOwnPersonalCheezus November 18, 2017
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Elizabeth Cook

No words cn dcribe ths girl, but im going to try.

The most amazing and beautiful girl to ever walk this earth. Small hands i love holding. Hugs that melt your heart. Great kisser. ALL MINE! And i say that with pride. Someone i dont get to see often enough. Full of love and happiness. Never fails to make my day or make me happy. There is no other person on earth like this girl. I love her more than life itself. She almost always puts others above herself. Very tolerant.
I just spent all day with Elizabeth Cook =)
by J.P.S January 21, 2011
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Chris Cook

he’s such a snobby ass motherfucker but in reality he’s an ugly ass redhead that has a downsyndromed sister and a fucked up mom that doesn’t love him and an alcoholic that drives around his daddy’s truck and works at a redneck tjmax
Chris Cook he’s a weird motherfucker
by ClapedF150 February 19, 2019
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