Paw Law 

If your pet is laying on you, next to you or anywhere that would disturb them if you got up, you are not allowed to. It is the Paw Law.

Dude: “Hey, come here to the kitchen.”

Chick: “I can’t!”
Dude: “Why not?!”

Chick: “The kitten is sleeping on me. I’m not allowed to get up. It’s the Paw Law.”

Paw Law by kristalskulls January 19, 2022

Germain's Law

Similar to Godwin's Law, Germain's Law states that, in an argument/debate/slanging match, the first person to reference the other person's mother automatically loses.

Guy 1: You totally stole that from a bumper sticker.

Guy 2: It wasn't from a bumper sticker, it was your mum's ass tattoo.

Guy 1: Germain's Law!

Germain's Law by WordsmithNinja March 23, 2009

Kyleigh's Law 

The bullshit law passed in NJ made to screw teens over. Under Kyleigh's Law, all provisional license holders under 21 must buy two red-orange $4 plastic velcro-like stickers to put on each license plate. These stickers were designed to help policemen target teenage drivers more easily. This coincides with the new restrictions set up at the same time, which shortens the curfew to 11:01 PM, and limits the number of passengers in the car to one (parents and guardians don't apply).

1: I was driving home late and the cop pulled me over because he saw my Kyleigh's Law sticker.

2: Fuckin' Kyleigh's Law...

Kyleigh's Law by mhsk April 15, 2011

Calvin’s Law

A standing workplace rule that states: Upon completion of your third bowel movement on the same work day, you are immediately excused from work for the remainder of the day. You clearly have larger problems than work to deal with. Go home, get your shit handled and return to work in the morning.

Named after the creator of the law, Calvin Johnson.

"That's my third shit today! Calvin’s Law is now in effect. I'll see you guys in the morning... I'm going home."

Calvin’s Law by TinMonkey August 5, 2014

Sin-in-law 

The relationship a boyfriend has to his live-in-girlfriend's parents.

Girlfriend: Mom, Andrew and I are moving in together

Mom: Oh, you're going to live together before marriage? Great, how I've always wanted a SIN-IN-LAW.

Girlfriend: But we love each other!

Mom: That's great, your love can help keep you warm right alongside the BURNING FIRES OF ETERNAL DAMNATION

Sin-in-law by green duck butter November 21, 2016

mother in law

Bringer of Hell to Earth.

Even driving my mother-in-law to the grocery store was a painfully horrible five minutes of my life.

mother in law by James October 31, 2003

murphy's law 

Shit happens.

I always fail to capture that damn roadrunner thanks to Murphy's Law, and all those defective, shitty ACME products.

murphy's law by Wily E. Coyote September 24, 2003