A two-wheeled traffic hazard wrapped in $400 worth of neon spandex who truly believes public roads are their personal Tour de France training ground. Usually spotted blocking the entire lane, preaching about “sharing the road” while sharing absolutely none of it.
They’ll ride three-wide through traffic, run red lights like they’re optional, and still look you dead in the eyes like you’re the problem. Owns a $6,000 carbon bike named something pretentious like AeroSoul X-9000, drinks beet juice “for performance,” and logs every ride on Strava like they’re saving humanity.
And heaven forbid you pass one. They’ll lose their Lycra-covered minds. Just ask Gary Peacock — the legendary Park City cyclist who called the cops on a kid named Pierce for daring to drive by him. This man literally opened the guy’s car door and shouted, “I have more rights than you!” while sweating righteousness onto the pavement. That’s the final evolution of the species: the Cop-Summoning Bike Paladin.
Then they gather in packs, vibrating with caffeine and moral superiority, taking up the whole road like a rolling cult of reflective tape and trauma. AND WHY ARE YOU ALL GOING 14 MPH UPHILL BUT 60 MPH DOWN? PICK A SPEED, GREG! YOU’RE NOT IN THE TOUR, YOU’RE GOING TO PANERA!
They’ll ride three-wide through traffic, run red lights like they’re optional, and still look you dead in the eyes like you’re the problem. Owns a $6,000 carbon bike named something pretentious like AeroSoul X-9000, drinks beet juice “for performance,” and logs every ride on Strava like they’re saving humanity.
And heaven forbid you pass one. They’ll lose their Lycra-covered minds. Just ask Gary Peacock — the legendary Park City cyclist who called the cops on a kid named Pierce for daring to drive by him. This man literally opened the guy’s car door and shouted, “I have more rights than you!” while sweating righteousness onto the pavement. That’s the final evolution of the species: the Cop-Summoning Bike Paladin.
Then they gather in packs, vibrating with caffeine and moral superiority, taking up the whole road like a rolling cult of reflective tape and trauma. AND WHY ARE YOU ALL GOING 14 MPH UPHILL BUT 60 MPH DOWN? PICK A SPEED, GREG! YOU’RE NOT IN THE TOUR, YOU’RE GOING TO PANERA!
by racoo01 October 24, 2025
Get the douchebag cyclist mug.Someone who says they were spreading misinformation based on if they were actually factually incorrect,
pretending as if they knew they were wrong the whole time.
Sometimes these types of people like to call people who see through the "misinformation" "nerds", as they are too egotistical to admit that they were just being a "dumbass".
pretending as if they knew they were wrong the whole time.
Sometimes these types of people like to call people who see through the "misinformation" "nerds", as they are too egotistical to admit that they were just being a "dumbass".
by not lakepants February 15, 2024
Get the schrodinger’s douchebag mug.Dude 1: Did you see Mike being totally obnoxious while he was hanging out from that douchebag Pierre from school?
Dude 2: Yeah, Mike is a totaly default douchebag.
Dude 2: Yeah, Mike is a totaly default douchebag.
by Genius, Billionaire, Playboy.. May 3, 2014
Get the Default Douchebag mug.William Morten Tong (Chinese: 湯偉麟; pinyin: Tāng Wěilín, born May 2, 1973) is an American lawyer and progressive politician who is the 25th and current Attorney General of Connecticut. Born in Hartford, Connecticut, Tong attended Brown University and the University of Chicago Law School. He began his career as an attorney with the law firms Simpson Thacher & Bartlett and Finn Dixon & Herling. In 2006, Tong entered politics upon winning election to the Connecticut House of Representatives to represent the 147th district, which includes most of North Stamford. He served six terms in the House from 2007 to 2019. During this period, Tong chaired the banking committee from 2011 to 2015 and the judiciary committee from 2015 to 2019.
In 2018, Tong was elected attorney general of Connecticut. He took office on January 9, 2019, as the first Asian Pacific-American attorney general and constitutional officer elected statewide in Connecticut's history.
In 2018, Tong was elected attorney general of Connecticut. He took office on January 9, 2019, as the first Asian Pacific-American attorney general and constitutional officer elected statewide in Connecticut's history.
by CTISTHESWAMP April 16, 2025
Get the Douchebag mug.To annoy. To raise a contention when no one cares for your opinion. To be thought of as an idiot, then to share ones opinion and to remove any doubt. To be utterly ignorant of just stupid you really are in the eyes of others.
by DocEMT February 15, 2021
Get the Oblivious douchebag mug.by G003y September 14, 2018
Get the DoucheBag mug.Someone who pretends to be above bullshit but is in fact the biggest shit stirrer with no loyalty.
Devoid of a backbone, this creature is famed for sniffing round social climbers because they can only feel comfortable around other scrotebags who have no moral fibre and are obsessed with image.
Often popular in politics the douchebag has very few, if any friends but often many transient relationships before the real colours become apparent.
Devoid of a backbone, this creature is famed for sniffing round social climbers because they can only feel comfortable around other scrotebags who have no moral fibre and are obsessed with image.
Often popular in politics the douchebag has very few, if any friends but often many transient relationships before the real colours become apparent.
Did you hear about that snake who knew that somebody was being framed for rape and did nothing to defend his mate, but lie and pretend he was being impartial. What a Douchebag style move.
by Not_another_fickle_fulhamer July 13, 2022
Get the Douchebag style mug.