squat cobbler

A person that is fully clothed, sits on any pie.(Boston cream pie, peach, Apple, and cherry). A costume is often involved. Variations include crybaby squat cobbler where the said person is crying, or also known as Boston cream splat east of the Rockies.

Hey jack let's make a squat cobbler video.

Hey Jim can I buy some pies for my squat cobbler group tonight.

by Agggg33 September 3, 2016

squat cobbler

The act of putting one's buttocks into a fresh pie, and wiggling their cheeks back and forth.

Some prefer that Squat Cobbler also involve the participant crying while performing the act.

Dude, don't eat that Key Lime Pie! Pryce just used it for squat cobbler!

by bigjohnston September 3, 2016

Squat cobbler

Fetish whereas sexual gratification is achieved by sitting on pies and or pastries. Cream pies and meringues are the most commonly used for safety reasons.

Kim:What's your turn on baby?
Sal: I'm a squat cobbler.
Kim: That's hot. Let me get you a French Silk pie.

by Clive Bixby September 3, 2016

squat cobbler

When a man sits in a pie and wiggles around.

Also known as a full moon moon pie.

Mr. Wormhole's baseball cards were stolen, along with his squat cobbler videos.

by zomgx3 September 3, 2016

squat cobbler

When a fully clothed man sits in a type of pie, the squatter also usually produces tears while performing the squats.

She has a squat cobbler fetish.

by JoeSmith94 September 3, 2016

squat cobbler

process of planting ones ass on a pie for sexual release

Andrew is a squat cobbler, it gets him off.

by The Glinch September 3, 2016

squat cobbler

A term coined on the AMC show "Better Call Saul", describing a particular fetish involving one's ass sloshing around in a pie. May also be used as a derogatory term toward an unpleasant person.

1. I know it seems like an unusual fetish, but Matt has a huge collection of videos depicting men performing squat cobblers.

2. You're a fucking squat cobbler.

by bouchole September 3, 2016