When one finally drops a quality hot and steamy log that hangs from ass to toilet water after extreme constipation and does not realize that it has not detached from the anal cavity, causing him/her to proceed with the wiping process, and violently "smash" through the log. It is called a "surprise" because the victim usually responds with "HOLY SHIT!" or "MY BUNG HOLE!" or "DOUBLE YOU TEE EFF!"
1. "I was walking past the bathroom while my brother was taking a shit and I heard the beginning poot but did not here the ending splash that usually follows. I realized what was happening and immediately yelled 'DICK, WAIT!....but it was too late..he had experienced his first Chinese Log Smash Surprise."
2. "After 3 weeks of being constipated I had taken my glory dump, not knowing that the magnificent log had not detached. As I went to wipe (from front to back) I had my 5th Chinese Log Smash Surprise this month!"
3. "After his Chinese Log Smash Surprise, Jim's hand never recovered..."
2. "After 3 weeks of being constipated I had taken my glory dump, not knowing that the magnificent log had not detached. As I went to wipe (from front to back) I had my 5th Chinese Log Smash Surprise this month!"
3. "After his Chinese Log Smash Surprise, Jim's hand never recovered..."
by Dr. Wack Meehoff October 14, 2011
Get the Chinese Log Smash Surprise mug.A term to connote a sudden unexpected shift in one's experience in life. Originated from the Japanese Anime Productions company which is known for their epic, train wreck, plot hax twists.
by feldspar December 22, 2008
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by Mike and Shane October 12, 2006
Get the Emeril Surprise mug.After taking a dump you realize that you need a deeper cleaning than normal. You layer up the tissue, insert it in to your anus, and push gainfully as to ensure adequate penetration depth. Unfortunately you pushed a little too hard and that cheap toilet paper that they stock in the bathrooms at the office is not capable of withstanding the finger pressure.
Your reaction time is not nearly quick enough. Your eager finger slips right through the gaping tissue hole in to your anus which you have purposely relaxed so as to allow for proper penetration. Your anus is not so relaxed any more and you instinctively tighten the muscles, producing a firm, albeit temporary hold on your finger.
You then hastily yank your finger out of your rectum causing slight discomfort as the small, twisted pieces of cheap tissue have caused immediate, itchy irritation due to their scrubbing your anal wall.
You muster the will to look at your finger. There is no time to become curious as to whether or not it will smell because you realize quickly that it does, partly because you wafted your finger to the frontal area where your senses are most responsive and partly because fresh, moist, shit that is not submerged in water creates a powerful odor indeed.
Finally, you require several rotations of hand-washing with soap to completely rid of the stench that has penetrated the oils contained on your finger.
This my friends is the Southside Surprise.
Your reaction time is not nearly quick enough. Your eager finger slips right through the gaping tissue hole in to your anus which you have purposely relaxed so as to allow for proper penetration. Your anus is not so relaxed any more and you instinctively tighten the muscles, producing a firm, albeit temporary hold on your finger.
You then hastily yank your finger out of your rectum causing slight discomfort as the small, twisted pieces of cheap tissue have caused immediate, itchy irritation due to their scrubbing your anal wall.
You muster the will to look at your finger. There is no time to become curious as to whether or not it will smell because you realize quickly that it does, partly because you wafted your finger to the frontal area where your senses are most responsive and partly because fresh, moist, shit that is not submerged in water creates a powerful odor indeed.
Finally, you require several rotations of hand-washing with soap to completely rid of the stench that has penetrated the oils contained on your finger.
This my friends is the Southside Surprise.
by slammerzee June 16, 2009
Get the Southside Surprise mug.When performing a sexual act involving defecation, said defecator experiences extreme diarrhea resulting in an explosive surprise for the fecal recipient.
Bruce: Hey Lance, wanna try a glass bottom boat?!
Lance: No brah, last time we did that you gave me a Hiroshima surprise...
Lance: No brah, last time we did that you gave me a Hiroshima surprise...
by ryo101 July 27, 2009
Get the Hiroshima Surprise mug.Can I have a salty surprise
by MC spunky January 1, 2019
Get the Salty surprise mug.That feeling you rarely get after the first time you actually enjoyed someone's company on a nice first night....
by A beautiful disaster July 15, 2013
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