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Retard Handshake

Going in for a handshake and 'accidentally' slipping a thumb in the other person's asshole.
"I saw that hot chick from the 6th floor in the elevator today, you know, the one I called dibs on, I nearly gave her a retard handshake as she walked out."
by slack455 July 31, 2012
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Obsessive Retarded

A person who, no matter what the situation, will choose the worst course of action. They appear to be compulsively driven to make poor choices, stupid comments and even worse life decisions.

This person is often caught up in small details that have little if nothing to do with the larger picture, or situation at hand.
WTF dude! This is the third time today you've got your dick caught in the vacuum. You must be Obsessive Retarded.
by Evil-Stevil November 9, 2010
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Magically Retarded

What my computer does daily whenever it freezes or doesn't work right. I.T. tells me to reboot, their answer to everything!
Every time I try to plot my drawing, it freezes up, it's magically retarded!
by Rhgrafix September 2, 2013
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Menu Retard

In reference to the video game world. A menu retard is one who infuriatingly frequently chooses the wrong option on the menu.
Archie - Francis, why do you keep going into Display Settings when you clearly require the options listed in Control Settings? You are such a Menu Retard!
by Ambercrombie and Felch February 27, 2009
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retard savant

A person with absolutely no real life or work experience who thinks that they are better and smarter than everyone. They claim to be smarter than everyone in the room but they are actually mind numbingly stupid.
Doug is such a retard savant, he actually thinks that Dragon Ball Z is real.
by CapnShea August 14, 2016
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dalton retard

Long Haired Truckee you will be able to find in any community that is classified as -Bogan- he will act stupid and do retarded thing to make you laugh
Look here comes Dalton retard, what's he gonna do this time???
by Blackhole Depression July 18, 2017
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Retarded Ava

A retard who only sucks her own jiblets. She exactly has 23 of them and they are all dried out. She waters them everyday but they won’t hydrate themselves. She will only eat rotten camel nuts to fulfill her dreams about having more nuts.
Jim: Ahh there is a retarded Ava, run because she will try to take your balls!!

Bob: It’s fine she already took mine, and it was painful!!
by Yert Skrt October 13, 2019
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