You can't fire me because I quit syndrome

The inability to accept the inevitable or obvious after an event has already happened.

Boss: You're fired!
Loser: You can't fire me, because I QUIT!
Boss: I don't know what you're quitting- I already fired you.
Loser: I QUIT, ya hear?! QUIT!!
Boss (to Secretary): Barbara, call security. We've got another case of "You can't fire me because I quit syndrome"

by Sir Andrew May 20, 2007

i am in constant agony, this is not a joke; please help me

I am in constant agony. My life is a mess. As a kid I had a natural aptitude for math and science, but I let it get to my head, ultimately ruining my possibility to go to college.

I wasted my life playing video games and watching the television; the natural talents I once had have apathied and worn away, leaving the one thing I was good at behind.

My life has been nothing but a fastly accelerating downward spiral and I have failed to provide anything of with to anyone.

Isaiah: Hey, Ed! Haven't seen you in a few years, how are you don't?

Me: I am in constant agony, this is not a joke; please help me.

Isaiah: ...
Me: ...
Isaiah: yeah, same.

by MrDrEdward October 31, 2021

Do you want me to walk you back?

When a female wants to let you know that she knows that you like her and she wants to let you know you’re in the friendzone.

Sorry about that Captain.

Guy> Hey (Girl’s name).

Girl> Hey (Friendzoned guys name), Do you want me to walk you back?

by FrostDont@Me June 18, 2019

Fuck me in the ass because I love Jesus

What I scream at my friends

“Fuck me in the ass because I love Jesus! Fuck me jerry FUCK ME”

by Chicken nugget lover April 24, 2018

fuck me up the ass like a Catholic priest

To take unfair advantage of someone, such as in business negotiations, while seizing the moral high ground.

Bob: We can purchase the equipment at a lower price AND from an environmentally conscious supplier.
Ted: Oh for Christ’s sake, don’t try to fuck me up the ass like a Catholic priest!

by Worthy_sojourner September 4, 2021

you ain't know me like dat ho

When someone be dissin' you n' sh*t you say dis sh*t and it helpz. forealz.

n*gga bout to get swung on for actin' a foo'!1~
you ain't know me like dat ho!
oh i see.

by P4UL TSUN4Mi October 1, 2007

I have to go now. My planet needs me.

What you say when you need to get out of an awkward situation, fast.

- Hey guys, what are you up to?
- Oh not much, just about to watch 2 girls 1 cup again. The cinematography is exquisite!
- I have to go now. My planet needs me. *walks away*

by UrbanPrick July 9, 2012