jump the couch

Anything related to bumsex.

<While in prison>
Convict A: Oooh, see him 'n his tight little ass?
Convict B: Yeah, player. Dats so hawt.
Convict A: He best watch himself and that cute little behind. Or I'ma jump his couch.

<Two people talking>

Tom: Man, Vanessa is goin' to come over tonight.
Tim: Yeah? You finally gonna hit that?
Tom: Yeah, she and I were talking. She said I could jump the couch with her.

by MonkeyStomp January 2, 2006

Jump the couch

refering to Tom Cruise's display of affection for Katie holmes. Meaning, did something stupid or idiotic

My friend benny just jumped the couch and had sex with my sister!

by Von Beckie September 5, 2005

Let me sleep on the couch

When you want to do something that someone else will not let you do because it seems less fun than the alternative.

You come back home drunk and your friend is trying to force you into your bed, but you say, "Let me sleep on the couch", and they will not let up until you are sleeping in your bed.

by Cosmo Poolaski July 9, 2011

Noodles-on-the-Couch Day

One of those days where you don't feel like doing anything so you just sit on the couch and eat Ramen Noodles all day

Friend: You good man?
Me: Nah. I've been having a Noodles-on-the-Couch Day since I woke up.

by Fergie03 December 31, 2020

mad doggin it off the couch

squating in front of the couch leaning back with your forearms resting on the seat cushions and then mounting your old lady dog style and using the couch as pushin leverage, has nothing to do with staring angrily at someone

me and my old lady was mad doggin it off the couch and brother let me tell you it was great!!

by the randyman January 16, 2010

jump the couch

"W. has jumped the couch."

"Not fallen off the couch, as he did when he choked on that pretzel."

"Jumped it." - Maureen Dowd, New York Times

"Then, as president, he jumped the couch by pedaling through the guns of August -the growing carnage and chaos in Iraq and Afghanistan." - Maureen Dowd, New York Times

by Troseph September 19, 2005

jump the couch

It's also a phrase used in the fraternity world when an active member puts his own status on the line for a rushee. He tells the house that he is "jumping the couch" for a rushee, and that the next vote to allow the rushee into the house is a simultaneous vote to keep the active in the house. Direct opposite of blackball.

After several unsuccessful votes to get his friend into his fraternity, John "jumped the couch" for Sam, but the fraternity still voted Sam down, so John had to leave the fraternity forever in disgrace.

by ThomasJay September 18, 2005