Napkin Friends

Friends you throw away after use

Napkin Friends. Use them. Abuse them. And throw them. (Away?)
Napkins have sad lives.

by SomeoneCoollike March 18, 2010

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Philadelphia Napkin

A dirty cum rag. Often used as a napkin on fancy occasions.

"Jesse, set the table for thanksgiving. Use the good Philadelphia napkins!"

by freudeschoener November 25, 2011

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Ham Napkin

A large, floppy labia, usually due to overuse or improper maintenance. Often found in pairs.

Carl: Honey Boo Boo's mom is enormous.

Rico: Yeah, I bet she's got a real nasty set of Ham Napkins.

Carl: I'd still do her. I think I have a problem.

by Gabe Lincoln March 23, 2013

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Stress Napkin

A piece of paper, napkin or otherwise, used to absorb a load of jizz that a man produces when jerking off to relieve stress.

This has been a crappy day at work. I'm going to grab some stress napkins, go to the bathroom, and have some alone time.

by knightsofsesquipedalia March 17, 2015

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ass napkin

A napkin made from paper towels or sheets of toilet paper placed between your ass cheeks over your butt hole to decrease the chances of getting shit in your underwear.

I took a crap at work and couldn't wipe my ass very good so I placed an ass napkin inside the back of my underwear over my butt until I could get home later and wipe and clean properly.

by paulmor909 September 5, 2016

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the pile of napkins one brings to the table at a restaurant such as chipotle or taco bell for everyone in the group to use. this pile is also much to large for everyone in the group to actually use and is therefore left in neat pile on the table for the next group of people.

randy and his friends kindly left their mutual napkins at the table for the next group to use.

by dishes are done May 31, 2010

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