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no lifer

Someone who has over 1000 posts on a message board.
You've been on dogbomb so long, I'm sure you're a no lifer.
by Jay See July 21, 2003
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lifer

A classification for the most perfect woman you've ever seen. The term comes from the belief that if you land such a woman and she decides to end your relationship for any reason, you must subsequently end your own life. The reason being that you would never be so lucky to land another such woman so anyone else would be a downgrade.

It should be noted that this is an exaggerated term and you should never kill yourself if a girl breaks up with you. Idiot.
Matt: Did you see that girl at the Racetrac?

Carlos: The one with the glasses?

Matt: That's her.

Carlos: Oh, yeah. Total lifer.

Matt: God help us.
by Carlos V March 14, 2013
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Related Words

Thug Lifers

People (usually white high-school kids)who just wanna be like Pac. They often have cell phones for talking to their peeps. They ride around in their parents pimped sedans (usually with said peeps) looking for younger kids to (1) sell pot to (2) beat up or (3) both.
Guy 1-"Whoa, that mini-van full of white guys just jumped out of a van and beat up that lone guy. What a bunch of Thug Lifers!!!"
Guy 2- "Yeah, someday I hope I can be one...let's go to the mall and buy faux-diamond earrings!!!"
by Flanstar August 30, 2005
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LifeKnight

He who makes baby Jesus cry.
There are no words in the English language to describe the hatred I feel for LifeKnight.
by Everyone. January 22, 2004
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Lifer

A person who has gone to the same school for 13 years, or from kindergarten to senior year. Lifers are only found in select private schools.
Jamie is a lifer, she's gone to school with Kayte.
by liferjane September 9, 2009
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LifeRules

THE MOST IMPORTANT LIFE RULES.
If you follow them, you will find true enlightenment.
Rule One:
Be friends with people who can get you free food.
Rule Two:
Don't get caught doing anything stupid.
Rule Three:
If/when you do get caught, don't do anything stupid to make it worse.
Rule Four:
Always play good music.
Rule Five:
Eat Cookies.
Rule Six:
When you aren't friends with people who can get you free food, find a way to steal food that is both quick and effective.
Rule Seven:
Learn how to play the guitar. It is both cliche and attracts members of the opposite sex.
Rule Eight:
Tell someone you love them.
Rule Nine:
Learn a form of martial arts. To kick peoples' asses as well as attract the opposite sex.
Rule Ten:
Always find comfort in Ben and Jerry.
Rule Eleven:
Take over-priced and crappy photos in a photo both with more than two people (cramped spaces make for better and more memorable pictures).
Rule Twelve:
Learn a foreign language and confuse people.
Rule Thirteen:
Talk to strangers: www.omegle.com
Rule Fourteen:
Eat a series of foods all with the word 'pop' in them (popcorn, poptarts, pop...and that's pretty much it)
Rule Fifteen:
Do flips on a trampoline.
Rule Sixteen:
Bathe in your own awesomeness.
Rule Seventeen:
Set someone you don't like on fire.
Rule Eighteen:
Jump out of a window.
Rule Nineteen:
Buy a dog and name it Susan. Raise it to be your best friend, always be there for it, and it will always be there for you. Love Susan and she will always return love in forms of wet sloppy kisses and tail wagging. One day, you'll accidentally hit her with your car and go through a horrible cycle of drinking and guilt. Eventually you'll get over it and will buy goldfish for the rest of your life.
(This rule is not necessary)
Rule Twenty:
Do whatever the hell you want. Who cares?
(this is considered to be the most important LifeRule)
By following these LifeRules, I have achieved enlightenment!
by SarahLiza July 28, 2009
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Lifernet

When your whole life revolves around the internet
I am always on my phone. I have such a Lifernet!
by DamienWayne March 29, 2017
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