granola boyfriend

A guy who buys all his food from trader joes and all his clothes from REi and Patagonia. He has serious mommy issues and thinks monogamy is overrated. You’ll often find him trying to convince you to do weed with him because it’s the real “Rocky Mountain High”. He has a man bun and wears his chacos to Climate Change rally’s and they stay on for sex.

“I decided I want a granola boyfriend.” “Why?”

by x_zOdiAc.SiGnS._x May 18, 2020

granola sports

Activities usually enjoyed by one or group of granola people together. These activities include hammocking, slacklining, rock climbing, listening to underground bands, playing the guitar and ukulele, playing catch with a frisbee and hacky sacking, and lastly, sleeping. All of these activities are enjoyed outside, where the granolas like to group up(usually the activity starts with only 3 people, then more granolas join in)

Tim, "where are you guys at?"
Sam, "were at the lake doing granola sports"
Tim, "sounds like fun, I'll be there soon!"

by Bargle monster roob November 9, 2012

Granola lot

A group of middle to upper middle class people working in charities, with little or no hands-on or genuine practical experience of working with people suffering in order to make themselves feel good and look cool, hip and fashionable.

Did you get help with your problem Dave?

No I saw one of the granola lot so I was belittled and given a leaflet.

by Reality Charity August 21, 2018

Granola Hoe

Promiscuous girl that likes to hike, camp, or just hang out in the forrest or wooded area.

My buddy and me ran up on some granola hoes in the woods and had a really good time camping.

by Vanalia Viking August 1, 2018

Granola Bar

Creator of friendship

Person 1: Want to be friends?
C2: Do you have a granola bar?

by THE REAL MAYO MAN November 19, 2020

Granola Baring

Sexual intercourse or masturbation.

"I totally granola bared with Stacey last night."

"Chris was obviously granola baring on the phone last night."

by lolpinapples69 August 17, 2011

granola gal

A dirty smelly hippie woman who doesn't shave her legs or shower. She has sex with endangered species and eats her own feces. This became a popular way of life during the 60's with stoners and losers.

That's the smelliest hariest girl I've ever seen. She must be a granola gal!

by chachaddict April 14, 2009