A one-way conversation wherein the passive participant cannot break away from the one who is speaking, despite the tediously protracted passage of time. This is a common manifestation of fucktardation.
The 'hostage taker' often falls into (but is certainly not limited to) one of these categories:
1. the drunk person with whom one is barely acquainted, but who adamantly refuses to recognize their lack of a substantial past connection with the hostage and continues to shout about themselves over whatever noise is happening at the bar/club/concert/tractor pull
2. a person who has experienced a recent break-up, and feels compelled to verbally re-hash the experience ad nauseum
3. someone who habitually takes otherwise harmless small talk to the worst possible extreme, talking the ear off of anyone who will listen about insubstantial trivia because they cannot comprehend the beauty of conversational brevity
The 'hostage taker' often falls into (but is certainly not limited to) one of these categories:
1. the drunk person with whom one is barely acquainted, but who adamantly refuses to recognize their lack of a substantial past connection with the hostage and continues to shout about themselves over whatever noise is happening at the bar/club/concert/tractor pull
2. a person who has experienced a recent break-up, and feels compelled to verbally re-hash the experience ad nauseum
3. someone who habitually takes otherwise harmless small talk to the worst possible extreme, talking the ear off of anyone who will listen about insubstantial trivia because they cannot comprehend the beauty of conversational brevity
person one: "Hey Dangus, how did things go at your family reunion?"
person two: "Sketchy! I got spotted by my drunk-ass aunt...the bitch talked my ear off for an hour about her divorce, like I give a shit...her crackhead ex is probably getting his fudge tunnel reamed in some sketch pad right now. The hostage crisis went on for so long that I was getting desperate...so I farted really loud on purpose while she was talking, and then remarked, 'HEY, DID YOU HEAR WHAT THAT ASSHOLE SAID?' The lush's mouth dropped open and I bailed...crisis averted!"
person two: "Sketchy! I got spotted by my drunk-ass aunt...the bitch talked my ear off for an hour about her divorce, like I give a shit...her crackhead ex is probably getting his fudge tunnel reamed in some sketch pad right now. The hostage crisis went on for so long that I was getting desperate...so I farted really loud on purpose while she was talking, and then remarked, 'HEY, DID YOU HEAR WHAT THAT ASSHOLE SAID?' The lush's mouth dropped open and I bailed...crisis averted!"
by hecktor dangus, esq. May 17, 2008
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1.) Used to describe something or someone that is clean or fresh
2.) Referring to a situation where something comes in clutch
1.) Used to describe something or someone that is clean or fresh
2.) Referring to a situation where something comes in clutch
1.) "Those rims you put on the Benz are crispolish"
"Did you see my brother rockin the bow tie at the wedding? He was looking real crispolish"
2.) "I can't believe you missed the game last night. They made such a crispolish play to end it in overtime"
"Did you see my brother rockin the bow tie at the wedding? He was looking real crispolish"
2.) "I can't believe you missed the game last night. They made such a crispolish play to end it in overtime"
by TheRealZu March 1, 2015
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when in the middle of a shower all of a sudden you have to shit so you run to the toilet all wet and take a dump
by Mr.CM December 17, 2009
Get the mid-shower crisis mug.Man, I just finished Half-Life 2 and now I have nothing to do. I feel so empty. I think I'm going through a Half-Life crisis.
by Cypher Seven July 24, 2012
Get the Half-Life Crisis mug.Crispy news refers to any information regarding someone that is newsworthy. It is a much stronger word then gossip.
by Ethi26 December 21, 2010
Get the Crispy news mug.when one is in a desperate need for a siesta because they become extremely tired in the afternoon and coffee isn't cutting it any longer.
"working at panera sucked today after that wild night of drinking. i had the worst mid-day crisis ever."
by belikecat January 9, 2010
Get the mid-day crisis mug.When it's the middle of the day, and you realize you have a lot to do and not enough time to do it. As a result, your mind locks up and you can't work, you just sit and pity yourself.
Usually caused by procrastination.
Usually caused by procrastination.
When you procrastinate too much and end up having multiple huge assignments (which you haven't started) due the next day, you may have a mid-day crisis, and end up laying on your bed throwing a tennis ball at the wall. Eventually you either say "fuck it" and don't do the assignments, or you get off your ass and work on them all night.
by whereismymind? May 11, 2010
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