How Americans, 6-year olds, and other illiterate people say “couldn’t have” because they have not yet understood the basic English language beyond a second grade level.
by TheAlwaysCorrect1 January 07, 2023
Usually follows “Imagine ___.” Can be replaced by, “can’t relate.” A subtle way to make fun of something someone does. Can also be used to tell someone what you’re doing.
teacher: max, please move to the front row, away from your friends.
bella: imagine being moved to the front row, couldn’t be me.
//or//
bella, calling max: imagine being in school right now, couldn’t be me.
bella: imagine being moved to the front row, couldn’t be me.
//or//
bella, calling max: imagine being in school right now, couldn’t be me.
by kindagroovin February 26, 2020
by gaymergaybie October 23, 2019
When an individual says something out of the ordinary, possibly erotic, homosexual, or suspect, and you choose not to identify with that individual by saying the phrase.
John: I ate her ass after she shat and didn’t wipe; I got some chocolate and ass last night
Me: What in the goddamn fuck? Couldn’t be me.
Me: What in the goddamn fuck? Couldn’t be me.
by Congo1234 September 20, 2018
You type the sentence "I couldn’t even edge to this, I exploded immediately!!! Clean up on aisle MY PANTS 😂😂😂😂" on a tiktok video. You found it so hot that you didn't have enough time to beat your thing to it, and you cummed immediately.
Tiktok video on a watermelon.
Some dude: I couldn’t even edge to this, I exploded immediately!!! Clean up on aisle MY PANTS 😂😂😂😂
Some dude: I couldn’t even edge to this, I exploded immediately!!! Clean up on aisle MY PANTS 😂😂😂😂
by Poopstinkyfart69420 November 25, 2023
by TheEndDragon October 10, 2023
When you wake up from sleep & your loved one is not there! You search for them and cannot find them.
by TheBlueLeo April 21, 2019