Skip to main content

Douche Smolt 

A young person or kid who is acting like a complete and utter douche bag. A play on salmon smolt which spawn and swim out to sea- a douche smolt spawns and migrates to where it can be the most douchey, around older douche bags.
That little kid is a pathetic douche smolt. Look how he migrates toward all those big groups of douche bags.
Douche Smolt by The_JDH July 24, 2009

douche satchel 

a "satchel" is a really big bag... of "douche". So someone who is a really big douche bag, would be a "douche satchel"

an expletive, used in instances of anger/frustration
That guy almost hit me with is car, DOUCHE SATCHEL!
douche satchel by tl77 November 25, 2010

Douche Scale 

Often, calling someone a douche doesn't seem to be enough to represent their level of douche-baggery, thus the douche scale was invented, so as to quantify one's doucheness. Depending on the area you live in , different things are equivalent to different values on the scale. A basic, point system is used (see example). Usually one is marked on their doucheness out of 100. Keep in mind that those are just guidelines as to point distribution.
EXAMPLE DOUCHE SCALE

Clothing (20 points):
- Popped collar in back but not on sides = 5 douche point
- Popped collar everywhere = 10 douche points
- Polo shirt of an arguably flamboyant color (usually from hollister or a company synonmous with it) = 10 douche points

Behaviour (60 points):
- Talking loud enough so everyone in a 50 foot radius can hear you = 10 douche points
- Talking about oneself chronically = 10 douche points
- Pretending to be a different ethnicity (e.g. wiggers) = 20 douche points
- General douche-baggery(you can choose what this may consist of) = 20 points

Physical Appearance:
- Gelled hair = 10 douche points
- Excessive facial hair = 10 douche points
Douche Scale by sauce^noob January 19, 2009

DOUCHE SACK 

A fanny pack worn around the waist, positioned in front rather behind.
"Look at that douche bag wearing that douche sack....it's so late '80s!"
DOUCHE SACK by AfterMidnight April 21, 2009

Double Duce Squared

A handgun chambered in the .22 W.M.R.F round. Same size 2x the stopping power. The round most commonly used for poaching, among other things.
The Duce Duce Didn't cut it, so I pulled out the Double Duce Squared and capped it's ass.
Double Duce Squared by Chas June 18, 2006

Douche Side 

When formerly nice/cool people turn into Douche Bags, they turn to the Douche Side of the Force.
After Kyler got a job he started wearing Hugo Boss and turned to the Douche Side of the Force.