i would rather shit in my own jocks and wear them as a hat

to put it in layman's terms, you make me so sick i would rather defecate at the expense of my own undergarments instead of being in your presence.

your so shit that i would rather shit in my own jocks and wear them as a hat than know you!

i would rather shit in my own jocks and wear them as a hat by discombobulator! November 21, 2010

I would be more apathetic if I weren't so lethargic 

From an episode of Family Guy where Peter tries to "educate" himself on proper edicate and ends up picking up a New Yorker. Being Peter, he turns to the comic section of the New Yorker and find "I would be more apathetic if I weren't so lethargic." And waits a few days trying to understand the meaning of it.

>"I would like a copy of the New Yorker Please"
>>"Okay"
>"I would be more apathetic if I weren't so lethargic? What?"
>"Ohhh I get it, can I get a jugs?"
>> "Sure thing"

I would be more apathetic if I weren't so lethargic by MwC June 6, 2004

I would, but I'm pregnant 

an excuse for doing nothing, used by women as a reason for not doing things that anyone else can do without a second thought

make the beds? i would, but I'm pregnant..

I would, but I'm pregnant by dilcurrie July 25, 2011

i would tax you 

I would fuck you.

Damn cutie I would tax you!

i would tax you by Joe mamma November 5, 2013

I would rather walk briskly through the gates of hell than

A phrase which is used to emphasise how much the speaker wishes not to do or take part in some activity, used as a response to a suggestion or request.

Comedic value is gained from the over emphasis of how much the person would not like to do said activity.

May have origins in a quote from the popular computer game "The Curse of Monkey Island" released on Windows 9x

Murray: You may call me ‘Murray’! I am a powerful demonic force! I am the harbinger of your doom! And the forces of darkness will applaud me as I stride through the Gates of Hell – carrying your head on a pike!

I would rather walk briskly through the gates of hell than attend a Justin Bieber concert.

I would rather walk briskly through the gates of hell than by Elthrin November 8, 2013

i would rock you 

playing a game and to have sexual intercourse after. Non stop and very violently.

we should play checkers. i would rock you.

i would rock you by beachbabe56 September 28, 2018

I would turn you in 

I would report you to the police.

If you kill someone, I would turn you in !

I would turn you in by Zulufly December 4, 2022