If it was a snake it would have bit you 

When you’re looking for something and it was right next to you.

Invented by Dillan H circa 2017

Tyler: Have you seen my screwdriver?

Dillan: Yeah right there dumbass, if it was a snake it would have bit you

If it was a snake it would have bit you by daddy dumbbell October 7, 2020

I'll have you know that I was drunk 

Excuse for the most embarrasing acts one can do. Often ends with: at the time of the fight, mooning, streaking, gay orgy, party, chumba wumba dance, felching, belching, farting, public Defecation, vomiting, monkey licking, pole humping, and the list goes on and on. Sometimes said as: I'll have you know that me and: the monkey, sasquatch, your girlfriend, or monkey sasquatch girlfriend, were both drunk at the time. If you're a recovering alcoholic, don't use it after you beat the crap out of a liquor store owner.

I'll have you know that I was drunk at the time of the floor buffer incident.

I'll have you know that I was drunk by Jim E. Junk March 15, 2006

All you had to do was follow the damn train, CJ!

A line from GTA.

CJ: doesnt follow the train
Guy: ALL YOU HAD TO DO WAS FOLLOW THE DAMN TRAIN, CJ!

All you had to do was follow the damn train, CJ! by idontevenknowwhatalifeis May 4, 2022

you were born from your mother's asshole, because her cunt was too busy being fucked by a dog 

perhaps the most offensive and all-encompasing insult ever conceived. either Portugese or Afrikaans in origin.

dude1: go on, say "you were born from your mother's asshole, because her cunt was too busy being fucked by a dog"

dude2: you were born from your mother's assho <dude1 punches 2 in face>

you were born from your mother's asshole, because her cunt was too busy being fucked by a dog by b4stard November 10, 2005

You could say it was the greate- 

The last words of Charles Calvin

RIP Charles

"We did it though. We got 'em. Pretty good plan. You could say it was the greate-"
*Sad music plays*

You could say it was the greate- by General-Kenobi September 8, 2020

I was meant for loving you baby 

The song I think of when making out with starscream
By Kiss

Me and starscream: *moans**kissing sounds**hot*
My Mind: I was meant for loving you baby, you were meant for loving me.

I was meant for loving you baby by Ariel Aries November 27, 2020

yes i did that and you would do it too for a check. I was an employee and I was going to get employed and thats on periodt! 

An extremely funny TikTok sound that we need to talk about more. I try to find places in my conversations to say it but there just aren't any chances. You best know the second there's an opportunity I will be saying it.

yes i did that and you would do it too for a check. I was an employee and I was going to get employed and thats on periodt!is very funny and iconic and DO NOT tell me different

yes i did that and you would do it too for a check. I was an employee and I was going to get employed and thats on periodt! by pop off kween November 13, 2020