ass crack of the bed

the space between the wall and the bed that you get stuck in when you roll over too far

"OMG you guys, last night you shoved me into the ass crack of the bed."

"Eff you broke the outlet."

ass crack of the bed by Andee Pitzz December 19, 2008

sweating the bed 

the damp, disgusting wetness one feels upon waking up in a bed that they have just moistened with their own sweat, not urine. nightmares and fevers are frequent causes.

"man, i totally sweat the bed last night"
"that's gross. your always sweating the bed"
"what? i changed the sheets"

sweating the bed by Jessica O'Neil January 27, 2008

sketch the bed

An exclamation used as a reaction to hearing some information about incredibly sketch behaviour. Derived from the common Bristolian saying "shit the bed".

Jon : "Did you hear about how he bootystepped 10 different people in 2 weeks?"
Chris : "What the fuck? Sketch the bed!"

sketch the bed by wl2009 February 9, 2009

White Glove the Bed 

Like crime scene investigators, but figuratively, wear 'white gloves' and clean up the bed (the crime scene) after an extra marital or secret sexual affair to get rid of the evidence left behind i.e. semen, cum, etc.

Stephanie and Sam had to white glove the bed after having sex so Sam's boyfriend wouldn't suspect anything.

White Glove the Bed by NeriumKiss June 24, 2016

Shit the bed 

When something goes horribly wrong, or mechanically or electronically dies.

"I hate my Samsung. I only had it a week before it shit the bed. I'm getting an iPhone."
When seeing the blue screen of death on your laptop: "Fuck! My computer just shit the bed!"
The lawnmower sputters to a stop in the middle of the yard. "There she goes--damn lawnmower just shit the bed.
After a disastrous first date: "Billy cooked for that hot girl on their first date. Talk about shitting the bed.

Shit the bed by Ms. Awful May 21, 2015

Shit in the bed

A major break down and/or collaspe with ugly conotations. Usually used to describe market activity.

The stock market really shit in the bed today after the release poor jobs data.

Shit in the bed by Sauceman December 27, 2004

SHAT THE BED 

WHEN SOMETHING GOES TERRIBLY TERRIBLY WRONG, OR BREAKS. USUALLY RUINS YOUR ENTIRE DAY AND MAY CAUSE SOME PEOPLE TO UNCONTROLLABLY SHIT THEIR PANTS.

TOM: WHERES YOUR BIKE?

ISHKEBIBEL: THE FUKIN THING SHAT THE BED LAST NIGHT, CAUSING ME TO DEFECATE IN MY PANTALOONS.

SHAT THE BED by WONDERBREAD AKA WHITE CHOCOLAT September 26, 2008