Clarinet 

Literally the best instrument and God's gift to the marching band
any other instrument can go suck an egg
has the b e s t sound

so much better than every other instrument

God: We need the perfect instrument, one to rule over the rest.
Angel: May I present to you, the clarinet
Gad: *GASPS* its beautiful

Clarinet by wootwootwootwootwoot March 12, 2019

Clarinet 

A woodwind instrument common in Marching, Concert, and Jazz Bands. It's normally black with silver keys and can play very soprano notes.

She sucks at the sax, maybe she should go back to playing the Clarinet

Clarinet by Kaytee P May 12, 2003

Clarinet 

THE BEST INSTRUMENT EVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

*dabs*

-written by a clarinet

Clarinets are the best instruments ever!

Clarinet by squidward333 January 10, 2019

clarinet 

That thing squidward plays

He plays the clarinet

clarinet by strevortni November 8, 2019

clarinet 

an instrument that you can't hear, even if there's 50 of them

Student 1: "Are the clarinets playing?"
Student 2: "Even if they were, we wouldn't be able to hear them."

clarinet by yamash September 12, 2016

clarinet 

a torturing device when played by a retard

Man "stop playing that fucking clarinet you fucking retard

clarinet by sidewalk banana June 1, 2009

Clarinet 

The gayest instrument ever. Clarinets are notorious to squeal and fail to recognize their true powerful overlords, the bass clarinets. Bass clarinets are the creators of clarinets and are so cool that they literally inspired the creation of the saxophone. All clarinets that aren't bass clarinets are small, fake, and gay. Even the oboes think they are annoying, and oboes are just glorified kazoos! Despite popular belief, all clarinet players are gay retards who think they have talent. If you play the clarinet that is anything lower than a basset (please see basset clarinet) clarinet, please, drink bleach.

Clarinet : Hi boys, want me to finger you with my clarinet
Glorified kazoo: Dude, I have a double reed instrument and even I think you are annoying
Saxophone: bass clarinet, are you really related to this guy.
Bass Clarinet: I hope not
Saxophone: Well, you both are clari-
Bass Clarinet: SHUT UM SAX, I'M THE REASON YOU EXIST!

Clarinet by MartyIsDaGayFagMLG December 17, 2016