This is the 21st century, right? Alexa can deliver our
instant gratification faster than our
cerebral cortex might prefer, our watch can order cocktails, and a movie, and
open the garage door, and yet, we're using antiquated vernacular to explain the simple fact that size, matters...
It's not the size of the wand, it's the wizard who wields it... Size doesn't really matter, does it, because if it does... It's the motion of the ocean, not the size of the surf board, that matter, right?... it's how you use it, that matters...
These don't exactly roll off the tongue with that "Siri, You rock!!!" vibe that we all know and love, do they? So, with much anticipated fan-fare, this one is for the ladies, and gentlemen, looking for that rock star, classy, cool vibe that even Siri might high-five you for, when one finds themselves in that awkward pastime of navigating the size matters debate.
New and Improved for 2026, Siri and Alexa both agree, this rolls off the tongue with less twisting:
"It's not the mass, it's the method!" Now, you can say a lot, without saying much at all. ;-)
A man and woman are chatting and people watching when suddenly a well endowed man passes. A silence falls over the two, as their heads turn following the gate of the passer-by. The woman, seeing a wave of insecurity washing over her date, breaks the
awkward silence with a reassuring affirmation:
"It's not the mass, it's the method!"
In a moment, what may have taken up the rest of the lunch hour, is now time well spent and all is right as rain with the world once more. Instead of a drawn-out diatribe of phonetic flavor crystals, the two are back enjoying each other's company free from vernacular shrapnel... sometimes, words just get
in the way of *
communication*.