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cook a fart 

Cooking a fart is when you release gas from your ass while sitting in heated car seats. Because of the heat, similar to food in a skillet on a stove, you get an overwhelming mix of scents and flavors that are intensified. Victims of the pungent odor can often tell what meals were involved in the creation of such farts as well and the aromas almost always beg for a window or two to be cracked.
Man 1: "Why does it smell like broccoli and cheese? Did you just cook a fart?"
Man 2: "We had Quizno's for lunch and yes, I just cooked a fart."
Man 1: "I can taste it. Is that peppercorn steak?"
Man 2: "Why yes, yes it is."
cook a fart by Kaznasty July 18, 2009
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Cook a cat 

A quiet expression of annoyance, particularly when you're clinically fed up.
Cook a cat by James Christ August 15, 2004

cook a turkey with gravy 

To have lesbian sex utilizing a turkey baster. Sometimes with the intent of becoming pregnant.
"Jen was a hurdy gurdy dirty little girlie
I heard it from a birdie she could cook a mean turkey
with gravy"
Excerpt of Lyrics from "Jane Fonda" by Mickey Avalon.

Hey Chris, I'd like to have a baby. Wanna cook a turkey with gravy tonight?

Cook a cricket 

Verb- to fart, to pass gas
If you are going to cook a cricket in the car, you should let someone know.
Cook a cricket by Phrantik December 2, 2010

Son of a Sea Cook 

A polite way of indicating something is wrong, a bother or an annoyance

Cook up a few Pies 

To cook up a few pies, is to get a few moisty’s on the go, is to collect honey from the hive…. You get it.
‘Let’s go to the clubs and cook up a few pies’

‘She was super into it, I was cooking a few pies for sure

Hey check those hotties, shall we go over and cook up a few pies?’

A.J. Cook 

The most perfect celebrity in the world, as featured on Criminal Minds.
This bitch is seriously beautiful. Too beautiful. She looks kind of like a goddess, and her while her fake fighting skills could be worked on a bit, she is a great actress.
She's also a proud Canadian, eh?
Long to short, A.J. is a flawless human being.
Person 1- Hey, I really need to see a beautiful person before my eyes burn out.
Person 2- CRIMINAL MINDS IS ON!!! GO STARE AT A.J.
Person 1- God, wtf, you're fucking insa--*turns on TV* HOLY SHIT SHES SO HOT

A.J. Cook is my reason to live.
A.J. Cook by AtotheJ Pagoat April 11, 2012