Management Trainee 

A taxi driving, car washing, over worked, under paid person in their mid twenties wasting their college degree on learning to take it up the poop shoot from bitchy customers who can't fathem paying for a rental car.

I have a degree in animal biology. Yet, I'm a Management Trainee. Spending my days washing cars in a suit and tie in 90 degree weather for a whopping 10.46 per hour.

Management Trainee by eracer March 27, 2009

management bingo 

an office game for yuppies and geeks

1. go to an office meeting

2. write down every newspeak term or off-the-cuff phrase

3. when you have five new ones, or five old ones from the official list ( you should have a keeper of the list), mumble "bingo" just loud enough for the people next to you to hear

Collect phrases like :

"moving forward" (in the future)

"Growing the business"

"mental bandwidth"

"de-risk"

"develop a plan around"

"Scrubbing" (as in checking over a list)

"partner with" (in reference to another work group)

etc...

Then for each meeting make a mark next to each one you hear, and write down the potential new ones. Five marks is a bingo!

(overheard coming out of a meeting) "Hey, I won management bingo today!"

management bingo by P Taylor February 17, 2008

Management Masterbation 

When Management does something purely for their gratification that will produce nothing.

Team building exersizes, employee surveys are just a few examples of management masterbation.

Management Masterbation by jayray59 May 6, 2010

Management by Spreadsheet 

An micromanagement technique whereby the micromanager generates an infinite stream of spreadsheets, mostly containing a hodgepodge of data, each purported to document and store a specific part of an employee's work output.

The employee is required to fill out blanks in the spreadsheet instead of remaining engaged in useful work.

The intent of the micromanager is to to attain control over all knowledge, gaining a sense of omnipotence. The inevitable end result is that spreadsheet maintenance becomes the only work performed.

Today I'm filling out one of his spreadsheets documenting my hourly work output. I'm really getting tired of Management by Spreadsheet.

Management by Spreadsheet by Dr. Specific September 22, 2009

Management Porn 

Graphs, diagrams and meaningless reports produced solely for the gratification of management.

Manager: I don't understand?
Techy: Oh. I should have generated some Management Porn.

Management Porn by SomePoorTechy October 10, 2008

Management jizz blanket 

a term used to describe the type of woman who sleeps with one or multiple members of the management team at her place of work. This is sometimes seen as behaviour common of those wanting a payrise or promotion, but this is not always seen to occur. It is often preceded by consumption of large amounts of alcohol and/or face stroking.

oh like some kind of management jizz blanket?

Management jizz blanket by Wisevalve November 6, 2010

management by driveby

When a manager comes whizzing through the cubicles to see if you need anything from him/her without stopping to listen to your answer. Way for manager to know what his/her people are doing.

Every morning Sherwin swings by our area to say hi and pulls a management by driveby.

management by driveby by Sun rays with a chill factor January 19, 2009