A refreshing asshole is generally a male. He is an asshole, he knows it, and quite simply doesn't give a shit. The refreshing asshole is not mean or cruel. He does not go out of his way to be mean. In fact he is generally a cool guy that lacks anything resembling a filter. It's a combination of zero filter, utter honesty, and complete disregard of any consequences. If you happen to come across a refreshing asshole you will find him to be a very funny and loyal friend. Assuming you are willing to have every single one of your shortcomings pointed out and ridiculed.
Sex at the video arcade: ie standing up because the booth is too small for otherwise. After a published Civil War soldier's letter referring to "horizontal refreshment".