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close your ass 

The order of requesting that somebody cease from talking pure unrefined bullshit from their mouth.
John Sopcak, please close your ass if you have no idea of what you're talking about.
close your ass by Close Your Ass January 10, 2017

ass clone 

Someone who acts or looks like an ass. Essentially, a clone of an ass.
Jim is being a real ass clone today.
ass clone by YOUNGDUS June 29, 2006

Close Minded Asshats 

The majority of people who post on here. Mainly the people who post hateful things about a group of people.
Don't hate someone because they are part of a group, whether they are juggalos, emo, scene, goth, metalhead, jock, etc.

If you do you are a close minded asshat.

(Some people might point out that I'm contradicting myself, because I'm calling a group of people close minded asshats. Sometimes you might need to contradict yourself to get a point across.)

ass closer 

When you clench your butt during an intense basketball game.
"How was the game?"
"It was an ass closer!"
ass closer by gregh March 8, 2014

closet rod in the ass 

When a guy lies to a girl and says he is gay so she will quit trying to rhino clam him, but somehow ends up in bed with a guy to prove it.
John: Hey, Stephanie is psycho, you should run away from that freak.

Ed: I am thinking about telling her I am gay so she'll leave me alone.

(two weeks later)

John: Hey Rich, how come Ed's been such a bitch lately?

Rich: I wasn't supposed to say anything, but he ended up taking a closet rod in the ass so he wouldn't get Cathy Bates'd by Stephanie.

John: Really!? What a fag!

closet asshole 

Someone who seems like a decent person in public but, when given the opportunity, says/does despicable things.
Jenny: Wow, Craig seemed so nice... then I looked him up on Facebook and saw all his mysoginist rude posts. What a closet asshole!