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safely remove hardware 

The greatest joke in the history of Windows computers.
User: Copying files onto my USB flash drive...Ok I'm done. Taking out the flash drive now.
Windows: Please click the Safely Remove Hardware icon in the system tray and select the device you want to unplug or eject, and then click Stop. When Windows notifies you that it is safe to do—
User: -yanks out flash drive- fuck you!

to play safely 

To maintain sexual abstinence, or limit sexual encounters to the enjoyments of self masturbation.
Abstinence or self masturbation are the only choices for those who intend to play safely.

When Mary caught chlamydia from a sexual encounter with a one night stand, she realized that while there is such a thing as 'safer sex', the only way to play safely is through sexual abstinence or self masturbation.
to play safely by sinn0cent1 December 27, 2005

simp safely

don't think, just read and process. it is what it means. simp. safely!

Don't simp so hard you stop living life.
"bro I'm so sad broo, she dumped me!"
"simp safely bro :/"
simp safely by 1_1 August 31, 2020

Slide home safely 

Using a condom while poppin the pussy.
Man that bitch I fucked lastnight wasn't on the pill so I had to slide home safely.
Slide home safely by A.M.P September 22, 2005

Safety Scissoring 

The sexual act of two double leg amputee women scissoring each other.
I should clear my history of safety scissoring before someone sees it.
Safety Scissoring by ETMZ October 9, 2014