wittyname's definitions
your state of mind when you hear the door bell ring and you suspect the police are outside but it's a girl scout trying to sell some fucking girl scout cookies
*Door Bell Ring*
Paranoid Person: Oh shit. I can hear the cops outside. *flushes eighth of weed down the toilet* *opens door*
Girl Scout: You wanna buy some Girl Scout cookies?
Paranoid Person: FML
Paranoid Person: Oh shit. I can hear the cops outside. *flushes eighth of weed down the toilet* *opens door*
Girl Scout: You wanna buy some Girl Scout cookies?
Paranoid Person: FML
by wittyname January 16, 2010
Get the paranoidmug. Bryan drank a bottle of Sailor Jerry's (Rum which contains alcohol in case you are a dumb motherfucker) and was motherfucking confident and comfortable with his own personality (the opposite of his usual self).
by wittyname January 19, 2010
Get the Alcoholmug. by wittyname January 16, 2010
Get the failing at lifemug. Mixing "fucking" into any phrase is like mixing alcohol with sleeping pills. It makes the effects way fucking stronger.
Kid 1: My fucking rat died
Kid 2: OMG!#@$%&!! Im so fucking sorry!
Kid 3: Good thing. This world needs less fucking rats
Kid 4: Jeeze Lou-eezz, Kid 3, can't you have some fucking compassion?
Kid 3: no
Kid 2: OMG!#@$%&!! Im so fucking sorry!
Kid 3: Good thing. This world needs less fucking rats
Kid 4: Jeeze Lou-eezz, Kid 3, can't you have some fucking compassion?
Kid 3: no
by wittyname January 16, 2010
Get the fuckingmug. as a small child: the firefighter that came to your school and showed you the fire truck
as a middle schooler: the shitty celebrity or artist that your classmates talk about on a daily basis
as a high schooler: your older sibling who gets plastered daily in college and refuses to acknowledge social norms
as a middle schooler: the shitty celebrity or artist that your classmates talk about on a daily basis
as a high schooler: your older sibling who gets plastered daily in college and refuses to acknowledge social norms
Teacher: Okay, class, who is your role model? *big fake smile*
MiddleSchoolKid 1: Your Mom.
MiddleSchoolKid 2: Your Mom jokes aren't funny anymore. that was so 2007. *flicks back hair in bitchiest possible way*
MiddleSchoolKid 1: *wipes tear off cheak* okay, my role model is Lindsey Lohan
MiddleSchoolKid 2: coke whore
MiddleSchoolKid 1: Your Mom.
MiddleSchoolKid 2: Your Mom jokes aren't funny anymore. that was so 2007. *flicks back hair in bitchiest possible way*
MiddleSchoolKid 1: *wipes tear off cheak* okay, my role model is Lindsey Lohan
MiddleSchoolKid 2: coke whore
by wittyname January 16, 2010
Get the role modelmug. Insert Name is reading UrbanDictionary because it is the most intriguing activity that Insert Name could think of doing at the moment in his life.
(Sailor Jerry says hi)
(Sailor Jerry says hi)
by wittyname January 19, 2010
Get the lifemug. stoner 1: hey man do you wanna smoke these dank ass buds with me?
stoner 2: man, i wish i could, but im clean. my parents drug test me.
stoner 2: man, i wish i could, but im clean. my parents drug test me.
by wittyname January 16, 2010
Get the cleanmug.