von groovy's definitions

extronet

A person who is an obnoxious, misguided, and intolerable extrovert online, but a true introvert outside of the web. These people feel brave and boastful, but are true cowards and have no original thoughts of their own.

Konstantine was online last night reading the comments he received on a post he made about neutering feral pets and became furious when he discovered the mean-spirited and overly political hate speech directed at him. He realized it was from his mild-mannered coworker Patrick. He made a plan to confront this extronet at work in order to get him to pee his pants.

by von groovy May 31, 2017

insertia

This term that is a portmanteau represents the tendency for someone to always insert themselves into conversations that they are not a part of and therefore being consistent and unchanged in their behavior.

As Donna began to speak about her wonderful childhood summer camp experiences, you know who resumed her act of insertia by announcing that she too had summers as a child but did not go to camp. Instead she had adopted a ferret that died in her arms and she remains traumatized by this to this very day. No one paid her condolences.

by von groovy August 14, 2024

tweaker tantrum

This is what happens when a meth addict is in the beginning stages of withdrawal and is faced with another adversity. They overreact to almost anything and it can be humorous.

After being kicked out of the Motel 6, Tyler was yelling as the garbage bag holding all his belongings was torn apart and they were spilled onto the lawn. An hour later he was seen passed out face first on the lawn. Passersby thought that he must have had one hell of a tweaker tantrum.

by von groovy September 17, 2017

as crucial as cucumbers

Unless your making pickles, cucumbers are not crucial so this is a saying when you declare something as not necessary.

As Mary was getting ready for her job interview, she realized that she had neglected to brush up on her Spanish. As this job required no language other than French, she calmed herself and realized her concerns were as crucial as cucumbers.

by von groovy August 9, 2024

black tights matter

A movement to ensure that women continue to wear yoga pants to the amusement of all straight men, bi, and lesbians everywhere

I was driving down the street and I heard some dude yell "black tights matter" at some apple bottomed belles.

by von groovy April 13, 2019

front flossing

The act of only flossing the teeth that people will see. People who engage in this behavior are often suspect of not keeping other areas as clean as they should be.

Peter: I just came back from the dentist and she was pissed at me.
Mary: Why's that? You seem to take of your teeth. Your smile looks clean.
Peter: That's it. She knows I am only front flossing. It was embarrassing.
Mary: It should be! Take an extra minute out of your day! I bet you only wash your hands when people are around.
Peter: Sometimes I only use water when soap is available. Even after a poo. I'm a mess!

by von groovy June 15, 2017

filler fruit

While some people call honeydew or watermelon filler fruit, this means a person. Not a homosexual! This is a person who isn't necessarily desired to hang out with but is selected when a specific number of people are needed for something. NOT pickleball!

As they were figuring out who would be playing each position on the kickball team, Hollee asked who would be left field. Heather laughed and said, "filler fruit Fred!" Hollee smirked and declared, "Heather! You are that bitch!"

by von groovy August 12, 2024