23 definitions by trilliam turdsworth
this is what happens when you fail to properly cleanse the grundle region on a regular basis. your taint gets staint. often it's brown at first but can take on more complex hues of purple and smoked caramel over time. experts say that ancient mesopotamians even cultivated staint patterns by eating diarhettic, richly hued foods. those with the most profound of staints could be smelt from miles away, as far as central europe.
i've been working on my staint. haven't cleansed in over 6 months.
that's a topic of disgustion.
i'm reaching for my goal.
that's a topic of disgustion.
i'm reaching for my goal.
by trilliam turdsworth January 10, 2023
farttown is where you go, metaphorically speaking, after loading up on a plate of beefy nachitos and plenty o' barolo. what's great about farttown is that anywhere can be farttown, your bathroom, your classroom, hell even your analysts's office. you know your in farttown when it stinks so bad ya can't breathe and when you leave you're clothes carry the stainch of tourds for days.
a: hey my dude, smells like you been to farttown.
z: why yes i have, jes' comin back from it. how'd you know?
a: you small like a toilet. no i don't.
z: yes you do man.
a: goddamn
z: why yes i have, jes' comin back from it. how'd you know?
a: you small like a toilet. no i don't.
z: yes you do man.
a: goddamn
by trilliam turdsworth May 18, 2022
of or relating to the stainage left inside the toilet bowl after you take a massive; or, a person who is the metaphorical equivalent of said stain.
by trilliam turdsworth June 11, 2017
Anu's Touch, stylized as Anustouch, is a permanently closed South Indian restaurant in Boobston, NJ that served what some consider them most innovative Indian dish of the 20th century: dehydrated miniature starfish in a brown curry glaze, garnished with corn. It is said to have tasted primarily of rancid vegetable oil. Other restaurants have attempted to reproduce the dish over the years, but none have succeeded in replicating the secret sauce—anu's touch. The founder, Jaggerwal Fatwinder, now long dead, claimed to have dreamt up the dish while under anaesthesia during the removal of a fat deposit in his forearm.
by trilliam turdsworth May 8, 2023
on certain occasions, after one has consumed a particularly elegant meal—for example, of curried mussels with sausages, french fried potatoes, and port wine drunk from pig's bladders—one may seek to capture the essence of one's gaseous excretions in a flask. this typically happens only once or twice in a decade. the very best farts are known "body-spirits," or "esprit-de-corps," in the original french. such ripples will gain in complexity during the years they spend in the bottle, acquiring notes of dogshit, turpentine, penis sweat, and shark farts.
jamal: shall or shan't we uncork a few vintage farts this eve?
edgar: but of course, my good man.
jamal: i'll let you do the honors.
edgar: let me just take a dump right quick.
jamal: yeah no prob.
edgar: just opened it. smells so friggin good. just smells just like a dick.
jamal: cool.
edgar: yeah sick.
edgar: but of course, my good man.
jamal: i'll let you do the honors.
edgar: let me just take a dump right quick.
jamal: yeah no prob.
edgar: just opened it. smells so friggin good. just smells just like a dick.
jamal: cool.
edgar: yeah sick.
by trilliam turdsworth July 22, 2021
when a white ass country club motherfucker takes his lil prick out and flicks it around in the face of an unwilling woman. usually performed after said country club assho' has done a few keg stands and given gay head to his friend tobin.
a: brett got pretty kavanasty last night
b: really?
a: yeah, he took his little winkledick out again and got up in a girl's face with it.
b: man, that kid sucks.
a: let's make him a supreme court justice.
b: okay cool.
b: really?
a: yeah, he took his little winkledick out again and got up in a girl's face with it.
b: man, that kid sucks.
a: let's make him a supreme court justice.
b: okay cool.
by trilliam turdsworth October 1, 2018
a portmanteau of the words "stink"and "pinkerton."
stink refers to something smelly, namely a fart.
pinkerton refers to a private detective.
thus, a stinkerton is a private detective hired to investigate the origins of a particular rip. the best stinkertons have backgrounds in fartography. if a trained fartographer is present at the scene of a true stink, undoubtedly he/it/they will be able to identify who released the rotten wind.
stink refers to something smelly, namely a fart.
pinkerton refers to a private detective.
thus, a stinkerton is a private detective hired to investigate the origins of a particular rip. the best stinkertons have backgrounds in fartography. if a trained fartographer is present at the scene of a true stink, undoubtedly he/it/they will be able to identify who released the rotten wind.
cadwallader: i lit'rally just dumpt unto my trousers.
triebwasser: shall we ring up a stinkerton?
cadwallader: wha'for, dear man? i just confessed to the smell-crime.
triebwasser: fair enough, my liege. 'tis a true abomination of the senses.
triebwasser: shall we ring up a stinkerton?
cadwallader: wha'for, dear man? i just confessed to the smell-crime.
triebwasser: fair enough, my liege. 'tis a true abomination of the senses.
by trilliam turdsworth November 5, 2019