thomas johnson's definitions

ice cream dealer

This is my business. I use it to trick the pigs innit. People come to me to pick up, and i just stick a bit of green or some jills in their ice cream, nah wot i mean.

u batty boy, ice cream boy, patrick!

by Thomas Johnson June 11, 2003

screwdriver

oh the screwdriver, my trusty screwdriver. boy this has come in handy on a few occasions....lolol! just a few.. i think not! yeah man, you can use this bitch for all types of things: ramming up bob and rikkys hair arses, protection, even doing D.I.Y around the house

a screw driver a day keeps the people who hate me and wana kick my phat arse away

by Thomas Johnson June 7, 2003

The Fight

This is where i knocked out tom johnson. He came at me with a flying kick, so i.... n a Muhammed Ali fashion leant back then bitch slapped that mother fucker to the ground. He wont mess with me i thought, as i walked away with the power of a gladiator, yet the physique of an elephant.

Ok then lads...you gotta admit, maybe he did win, but i am still undefeated.

by Thomas Johnson June 22, 2003

bum fluff boy

i dont shave my bum fluff cos it makes me look more of a man for the ladies.

look at me! (tom johnson)

by thomas johnson July 29, 2003

wank engine

Derives from the term "thomas the tank engine" but applied to a certain dandruffed overweight no-mum "thomas the wank engine" is appropiate as it describes hes dirty habitit of playing with hes choad. if u are unsure of this other term look it up. CHOAD

i wouldnt mind choo choo-ing on jackies clit and emptying my tank load on her engine.

by thomas johnson June 12, 2003

havers lane

this is where i'm at, you know my crib. its a fat place, just opposite my bezzy mate leo (wee've had some good times - like the time when we was pist round his crib, and we shouted "get ya tits out" to this fit biatch. turned out to be my mum, but hey, thats a story for another time)i like the idea of havers lane being known as 'gangsters paradise', i get a lot of attention when girls ask me where i live, they all just want to cotch at my crib.

Alright phatty, wheres yo crib?
Havers lane
oh my god! i wanna cotch at ure crib!

by Thomas Johnson June 9, 2003

sister sue

hey man my sister sue is so sexy man she wants it.

hey suzie COME HERE!

by thomas johnson June 30, 2003