the coMANd'r's definitions

shit gravy

diarrhea

Paige went to Cabo last weekend and had a blast, no pun intended. Loved the food, but ended up making shit gravy because if it.

by the comand'r September 20, 2018

Heat seat

The uncomfortable situation when using a toilet and the seat is warm from the previous user.

Brendan: I was at work early this am and hardly anyone was in the office, though when I went to take a dump, I found the seat was warm.

Frank: Man, what are the odds. There are four stalls and you chose the one with the heat seat.

Brendan: ya, not great way to start my day. I was simply finishing my coffee.

by the comand'r October 15, 2016

fumpire

Short for "f-ing umpire" or a lame umpire/referee who makes poor or one-sided calls in a game, especially against your team.

That fumpire is horrible. If he had another eye, he'd be a cyclops!

by the comand'r October 3, 2013

schmanna

Slang for “shit man ya” when your are too drunk to complete the full 3 syllables distinctly, just blend them in to one word

Tamara: Bri is on her 8th shot of tequila. She is having her own tequila session

Adam: Hey Bri, you wanna climb in to that shopping cart and got for a ride?

Bri: Schmanna!

by the comand'r June 29, 2022

plowed and loud

When someone is hammered thereby driving their voice up significantly.

I love the Gru, but he's noisy enough when he's sober, but when he drinks he is plowed and loud

by the comand'r October 26, 2017

extortion abortion

When an extortion attempt turns in to an aborted mission

Hub: dude, what even happened to the whole shit-show with Patricia?

Barney: you mean the voice memo threatening me with urban dictionary posts to get me fired?

Hub: ya, did you turn that voice memo in to the police and California Bar Association?

Barney: nah, from some reason she backed off after filing a bunch of anonymous complaints, essentially pulling an extortion abortion and not sure why. Oddly he switched is focus on Kat with anonymous tips

Hub: ah, total douche defined...

by the comand'r November 20, 2023

fonduece

What comes out of you the morning after eating a whole lot of cheese. Also known as a fondump.

Dude, I went to this wine and cheese party last night and ate so much cheese that I blew out a fonduece this morning. It was sloppy!

by the comand'r October 5, 2013