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Definitions by telephony

I Changed the Garbage 

A little jingle sung to the tune of, "I Shot the Sheriff" that I made up back in 2006 or 2007.
♫ I changed the garbage, ♫
♫ And I took out the re-cy-cl-ing! ♫
♫ I changed the garbage, ♫
♫ And I took out the re-cy-cl-ing! ♫
I Changed the Garbage by Telephony September 4, 2015

nasal tissue 

What many people call facial tissue, such as Cleanax (Kleenex), Puffs, etc.
So called because it is usually used for blowing the nose; though on occasion they are used to wipe away eye boogers.
Hey Nora, be a dear and get me some nasal tissue please. I need to blow my schnoz!
nasal tissue by Telephony August 26, 2015

Dr. Don'tlittle 

Somebody who understands what animals say, but only very bad things.
Like Dr. Don'tlittle, I understand what the animals are saying.
To most people, it just sounds like a harmless quack or moo or bleat,
But I know, they're going to kill me in my sleep!
Dr. Don'tlittle by Telephony August 10, 2015

I've Been Sitting on the Shitbowl

A phoney-bologna fake made-up song, sung to the tune of, "I've Been Working on the Railroad".
♫ I've been sitting on the shitbowl ♫
♫ All the live long day ♫
♫ I've been sitting on the shitbowl ♫
♫ Just to waste my time away ♫
♫ Don't you hear the pisser flushing ♫
♫ Sleep in so late in the morn ♫
♫ Can't you hear the restroom attendant yelling ♫
♫ Quick, get an air horn! ♫

pit shit 

Underarm deodouriser of any type (aerosol, roll-on, stick, wipes).
Jason smelled like the proverbial rose today because he doubled up on pit shit this morning.
pit shit by Telephony August 6, 2015

bugicide 

Insecticide -- usually in an aerosol bomb (spray can) such as Raid or Black Flag.
Mark, be a dear and fetch me the bugicide please! There's a fucking cockroach in the douchewasher again!!!
bugicide by Telephony July 26, 2015
I had a blow of store-brand Rice Checks cereal for breakfast this morning.
blow by Telephony July 23, 2015