NSGF

No Sex GirlFriend (noun). A girl who you share all the girlfriend experiences with but you don't have sex.

"Dude, you're stuck in a full-blown NSGF situation. You may as well start banging!"

by secretuser420 February 20, 2018

queer beard

Someone who you coauthor with who has a marginalized gender identity or sexual orientation (e.g. LGBT2Q+), in order to credibly discuss issues of gender as a cishet person. Could equally apply to people of marginalized racial identities (see race beard).

That guy only writes with so-and-so so he can talk about queer topics without being attacked, and get into those progressive journals! I would go as far to say he's using them as a queer beard...

by secretuser420 April 07, 2020

tumblefur

The furry equivalent of a tumbleweed. Usually from balls of fur from a house pet that accumulates and rolls around your apartment.

Mind the tumblefurs. Vacuum works best to catch the buggers.

by secretuser420 June 19, 2018

Iron dome

Getting a blow job (i.e., fellatio) from an Israeli Defense Forces (IDF) soldier, typically while on Birthright.

Typically from a woman soldier, but Israel is the most socially progressive country in the middle east (that doesn't say much, true), so it could be from a guy too...

See also: Girthright

Friend 1: Dude I don't want to go on birthright, it's such a Zionist scam.
Friend 2: Just go take the trip so you can get that iron dome!

by secretuser420 June 20, 2022

race beard

A token BIPoc person you are friends with so you don't appear racist.

See also: queer beard

"We need more diversity in our friend group. Shall we invite Steve?"
"Steve? Oh, you mean the black Steve!"
" Dudes, Steve knows you're using him as a race beard, eh."

by secretuser420 May 07, 2022

Sigh offensive

The use of loud obnoxious sighing as a passive aggressive attack on people in your proximity, usually in attempt to clear them from a room or at least annoy them.

"My office-mate keeps was on an all out sigh offensive yesterday. It made it impossible to get anything done, I was so annoyed, I just left and went to work at home!"

by secretuser420 January 23, 2023

Freudian autocorrect

A Freudian slip made by inadvertently texting someone what you unconsciously meant, and then saying it was autocorrected text (even when it's super implausible that it autocorrected to that).

/SMS dialogue/
gf: I feel rough af, think i'm getting sick
bf: Take some penis, it'll make you feel better

bf: Echinacea*. Damn Freudian autocorrect.
gf: ahaha. there is no way it autocorrected to that
bf: it Freudian autocorrected

by secretuser420 December 05, 2022