pollup's definitions

mutton cunt

When a girl's vagina tastes a little funny. Sometimes the "mutton-esque" flavour comes on as the result of middle age.

When you eat out the snatch of an 18-year old girl, it tastes quite a bit like lamb chops.

But when you eat out some dirty old cougar, it tastes kinda wonky. A mutton cunt!

BAAAAAAA!

by Pollup January 14, 2008

indian shit

When you are camping or ice-fishing and have to take a huge dump in the snow. The dump is typically really red with chunks of corn in it.

Dude, put down that fishing rod and come check out this huge indian shit I just took. Look, stir it up with a stick. There's a whole bunch of corn in it. Sick!

by Pollup December 22, 2007

revenge

When you trick a seemingly innocent girl into letting you have anal sex with her, and you return from the bathroom to find that she's gone and has taken a huge shit in the middle of your bed.

Sometimes, if she was super pissed about it, she takes the dump in your drawer and you don't find it for a few days.

Biff: "Hey Floyd - that stupid slut you hooked me up with last night. Yeah, uh, I don't know how to tell you this, but she crapped in my bed."

Floyd: "Uh...what do you mean?"

Biff: "Are you retarded? I fucked Leona in the ass, and then when I went to wash my cock off she took a massive crap in my bed. Those sheets will never be the same. Corn and peas. NA-A-STY!

Floyd: "Corn AND peas? That is fucking rotten. I mean, if it was only corn I could see-"

Biff: "Shut up you asshole. Listen, you're not going to tell ANYONE about this. I'll beat your ass if you do. But seriously, that bitch got pretty hard revenge on me. My mama gave me those sheets and she always asks about them. How can I tell her that some skank took a huge, squirrelly dump in them because I analed her?"

Floyd: "Just tell her that a homeless guy broke into your-"

Biff: "Dude, you suck."

by Pollup December 25, 2007

Ewok balls

When Chewbacca roars at your nuts and they shrivel up into cowardly little hairy Ewok puffs.

Man, I was battling the Empire and accidentally shot Chewie in the ankle with my laser gun. He grabbed me and threw me across the room. Then he roared at my nuts and they shriveled up into little puff balls.

They were Ewok balls.

by Pollup January 14, 2008

booger sex

When KY Jelly isn't available and you need to lube up your grandma's sandy old dust snatch.

Man, my grandma was really horny last night. I decided to oblige after she took her teeth out.

Fumbling in the poorly lit bedroom, I couldn't find my tube of lube. She moaned "give it to me Hansel!"

Shuddering with disgust, I closed off my left nostril and blew a filthy, brown-green snot clot all over her clitoris (which was withered and deformed with age).

Then I gave her a hard hump and had my first official booger sex.

by Pollup December 11, 2007

cock vendor

A really, really huge black dude who pimps out skinny white dudes. Cock vendors are usually named Aram or Jeeves and they always carry a machete. They are descendants of the great "Harry White," a prostitution visionary.

You can find cock vendors in most large cities hanging out on the corner pretending to be Rastafarians. Don't be fooled - the hair is fake.

Not to be confused with pimps.

Man, let's grab some grub and then go visit the cock vendor. He'll fix us right up.

by Pollup December 11, 2007

help

Dude! you gotta help me. I'm trapped in my room and there's some fucking guy outside. He's freaking the shit out of me. He's got a gun and his name is Biff.

I know this is fucked up - just add this definition so the world can know.

Please.

Help!

Help - add this as a definition you retard! Save me from the guy!

by Pollup January 13, 2008