monkey mind

Meditation term for a mind that refuses to be quiet and concentrated, so that your meditation is interfered with by your attention constantly finding new objects, like a monkey roaming through your brain.
If I concentrate very quietly I am sure I can think of an example, such as I wonder if Sandra wears panties in the summer?, no I mean an example of monkey mind, for which I need to concentrate like lemon juice concentrate god that's the best stuff for making lemonade to families with dependent children like monkeys infesting the mind and asking questions authority and authorizes questions come on there has to be an example of monkey mind your own business monkey business suit monkey suit
by old lang guy October 17, 2006
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tits on a rooster

1: Double useless, something with no point at all. Comes off of "tits on" any male mammal, since males don't nurse the young; chickens of course don't nurse their young at all, so tits would be especially useless on a rooster.

2: derogatory for tiny or very small breasts
He's not even tits on a boar, at best he's tits on a rooster.

So we had it about worked out when Tits on a Rooster finally showed up, and it all had to have his input.

She's got about the same tits God gave a rooster.
by old lang guy October 29, 2006
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fork stuck in the road

A song line that seems to indicate ignorance, sloppiness, or lack of education on the part of the songwriter.

According to urban legend, the line in Green Day's "Good Riddance (The Time of Your Life)" "a fork stuck in the road" says that the fork is "stuck" rather than just "in the road" because of the mistaken idea that people somewhere back in "olden days" used to stick dinner forks into the road when they changed directions; the claim is often made that one or another member of Green Day told such a story during an interview, but if so there doesn't seem to be any such interview online. It really doesn't sound like them; they're a pretty bright bunch of people.
Alanis Morisette's "Ironic" is a fork stuck in the road; nothing she describes in the song is ironic.

"Hey, that doesn't mean what he thinks it means!"
"Relax, dude, at least it rhymes, and it's just a fork stuck in the road!"

Every time you hear the rolling thunder, you don't need to run, because the lightning already struck and you're still here to hear it.
by old lang guy September 29, 2006
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fork stuck in the road

Any exceptionally stupid or illiterate phrase found in a pop song. Particularly if it's then defended or expounded upon in various "meanings of lyrics" sites or in fan writing. A lot of pop stars were so totally created by parents/managers/agents/etc. that they went straight from a suburban bedroom to the celeb suites without having read a book or talked to a real person on the way, getting all their alleged education from other pop songs and tv.

The words "fork stuck in the road" originally occurred in a Green Day song, and in a later interview (urban legend has it) the songwriter came up with a long story about how people on journeys would stick a dinner fork into the road to show they'd been there or some such -- apparently being unaware that a dinner fork was originally a "forked spoon", i.e. one that split, the way a forked stick or a forked road splits, and that a "fork in the road" is a place where you make a decision, not a milestone or boundary marker. (I can find no evidence that any such interview occurred, but it seems to be widely believed in).
"Hey, somebody should tell Alanis that every time you hear the rolling thunder, it means the lightning already missed you. And read her a definition of ironic."

"That's like so unfair! She was saying that like, he runs away when there's no reason to! And she was making fun of the way people use the word ironic wrong!"

"Naw, it was just another fork stuck in the road. She's the fork stuck in the road goddess."
by old lang guy September 09, 2006
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tugovers

A pair of shorts so short (esp. in the crotch) that it's physically possible to have intercourse with a woman wearing them without having to pull them down.
See any Girls Gone Wild video for plenty of girls in tugovers!

We were making out and I got two fingers around one side of her tugovers.
by old lang guy August 27, 2010
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run up

A noun in military, engineering, and political speak. Means the period of preparation leading up to roll-out, especially the most frantic no-sleep, no-time, any-expense, just get something no matter what period.
That whole week was the run up to Operation Blue Arrow, so I got about three hours of sleep a night if I was lucky.

Wooo-hoo, unlimited overtime for the run up to the release of MyThing!

We'll need the major nets, papers, and blogs watched twenty-four seven for the run up to the Iowa caucuses.
by old lang guy September 05, 2006
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douchebag

Nick Bilton, whose March 10 article in the New York Times managed to explain how to be a digital/electronic douchebag for the audience of the New York Times.
Nick Bilton, of the New York Times, is such an utter douchebag that, in a section of the country and a social class noted for its production of douchebags, he is an instructor of others in how to extend douchebaggery to the digital realm.
by old lang guy March 20, 2013
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