1-800 prophecy

(n.) a correct prediction when one's phone rings that it is a telemarketer calling.

A 1-800 prophecy is often celebrated by briefly answering the call to insult the telemarketer.
We toasted to Cameron's 1-800 prophecy at dinner.
by nolandc September 02, 2019
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K2 Complex

(n.) a sensation of inferiority arising in an ultra-tall person when they walk into a room and there is someone taller.

Named after the second highest mountain on earth, K2.
Shaq struggled with a K2 Complex when playing against Yao Ming.
by nolandc September 02, 2019
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shelf death

(n.) the choice to give up on your crush because you've been put on the shelf for too long.

Humans tend to carry shelf lives of several months -- much shorter than that of canned foods. The average human will shelf die more than once in their life.
Luke is going through a tough shelf death after Mary stopped responding to his messages last month.
by nolandc September 02, 2019
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gossip breath

(n.) someone who has been caught in the act of gossiping.

Named after the stank lingering on the breath of someone who just uttered a filthy rumor. Often, friends will go out of the way to avoid a gossip breath out of fear of being featured in their next rumor.
I could smell Erin's rank gossip breath from behind my back.
by nolandc September 12, 2019
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DILB

short for a "Dad I'd Like to Befriend"

Kind, fun, and overweight, DILBs send out family-friendly vibes from all the way across Main Street. One can't help but call him "grill god" and throw a baseball in his direction. Every time a DILB makes a dad joke, a puppy is born in Heaven.
Omg Pete is such a DILB.
by nolandc September 28, 2019
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clustertuck

(n.) A group of middle-aged men with tucked-in shirts and hiked-up shorts.

They tend to cluster at social gatherings to vent about their children or work. Most frequently spotted in pockets of Suburban America, the clustertuck is an endangered social unit due to the rise of Millennial fashion trends.
The clustertuck discussed IT solutions at a backyard bbq.
by nolandc August 30, 2019
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snowflake affair

(n.) A relationship affair that occurs exclusively over Twitter DM.
After participating in the #deportcannibals movement on Twitter, Mike and Jenna entered a snowflake affair.
by nolandc September 08, 2019
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