nicholas d's definitions
From Hank Williams Jr's song "Family Tradition":
Hank: "So don't ask me, Hank, why do you drink?"
Crowd: "To get drunk!"
Hank: "Hank, why do you roll smoke?"
Crowd: "To get high!"
Hank: "Why must you live out the songs that you wrote?"
Crowd: "To get laid!"
Hank: "So don't ask me, Hank, why do you drink?"
Crowd: "To get drunk!"
Hank: "Hank, why do you roll smoke?"
Crowd: "To get high!"
Hank: "Why must you live out the songs that you wrote?"
Crowd: "To get laid!"
by Nicholas D May 29, 2009
Get the roll smoke mug.Al Gore: "Governor Bush, you are not going to nap this election!"
George W. Bush: "Oh yes I am. Heh heh heh!"
Girl: "I'm going to run to the ladies' room. Watch my purse while I'm gone."
Guy: "OK."
(Girl goes to restroom, someone steals purse)
Girl: "Where's my purse?"
Guy: "Some sketchy-looking dude came by and purse-napped. Sorry."
Girl: "What? I told you to watch it!"
Guy: "I did. I was watching the entire time the guy was napping it! What did you want me to do, stop him?"
Girl: "Yes!!!"
Guy: "Oh, well you should have said that earlier."
George W. Bush: "Oh yes I am. Heh heh heh!"
Girl: "I'm going to run to the ladies' room. Watch my purse while I'm gone."
Guy: "OK."
(Girl goes to restroom, someone steals purse)
Girl: "Where's my purse?"
Guy: "Some sketchy-looking dude came by and purse-napped. Sorry."
Girl: "What? I told you to watch it!"
Guy: "I did. I was watching the entire time the guy was napping it! What did you want me to do, stop him?"
Girl: "Yes!!!"
Guy: "Oh, well you should have said that earlier."
by Nicholas D February 27, 2009
Get the nap mug.Someone who is washed up, has gone soft, and no longer commands respect in the hood. From Ice Cube's song "Check Yo Self."
"You're gone, used to be the Don Juan, now your name is just Twan."
-Ice Cube, "Check Yo Self"
Carlos: "Whats up dogg, long time since you been back in the hood."
Tony: "For real. What's going on with J.D. these days? That dude used to run shit around here."
Carlos: "Fool has gone soft. Now he ain't nothin' but a twan. He settled down with some bitch and she's got him whipped. I saw him last week walking her weak-ass chihuahua around the block, cleaning up its shit and shit. Then I saw him with that ho the other day going into the movies to watch 'Confessions of a Shopaholic.'"
Tony: "Man that is some mark-ass shit! We gotta straighten that twan-ass bitch out. Let's ride on that fool."
Carlos: "Word."
-Ice Cube, "Check Yo Self"
Carlos: "Whats up dogg, long time since you been back in the hood."
Tony: "For real. What's going on with J.D. these days? That dude used to run shit around here."
Carlos: "Fool has gone soft. Now he ain't nothin' but a twan. He settled down with some bitch and she's got him whipped. I saw him last week walking her weak-ass chihuahua around the block, cleaning up its shit and shit. Then I saw him with that ho the other day going into the movies to watch 'Confessions of a Shopaholic.'"
Tony: "Man that is some mark-ass shit! We gotta straighten that twan-ass bitch out. Let's ride on that fool."
Carlos: "Word."
by Nicholas D February 18, 2009
Get the twan mug.An acronym for Pay Out Of Pocket. Refers to something that insurance (typically health insurance) doesn't cover.
That's a pretty sweet colostomy bag, but I'm not going to POOP for it!
Doctor: "Your rectum is blocked and we need to operate. Unfortunately your insurance doesn't cover it. You need to POOP."
Patient: "No shit I need to take a crap. Get in there and operate, dude!"
Doctor: "No, not crap. POOP."
Patient: "Same thing. Crap, poop, shit, drop a deuce, take a dump, drop off the Cleveland Browns at the Super Bowl, same thing."
Doctor: "Never mind. I'll send you the bill."
Doctor: "Your rectum is blocked and we need to operate. Unfortunately your insurance doesn't cover it. You need to POOP."
Patient: "No shit I need to take a crap. Get in there and operate, dude!"
Doctor: "No, not crap. POOP."
Patient: "Same thing. Crap, poop, shit, drop a deuce, take a dump, drop off the Cleveland Browns at the Super Bowl, same thing."
Doctor: "Never mind. I'll send you the bill."
by Nicholas D December 17, 2013
Get the POOP mug.A simple drinking game that simply involves a smooth table surface (usually 6-9 ft long), 2 or 4 players, several cans of beer (as many as you want to drink), and a floor you don't care about getting beer all over. NOTE: The table should be watered down for optimum can-sliding.
The rules:
1) Players alternate sliding full beer cans back and forth across the table.
2) 3 possible outcomes occur:
a. The beer can falls short. Nothing happens.
b. The beer can falls over the edge. The other player must CATCH IT (this takes minimal coordination, but you'd be surprised how clumsy some people are). If you don't catch it, someone will probably have beer explode in his/her face later.
c. The beer can hangs over the edge. That is, if you get under the edge and can see can bottom, it counts. In this case, the other player must DRINK IT. All of it. Then get a new beer can to play with.
NOTE: The drinking player must open the can no more than one foot from his/her face. If the can has been dropped, the explosion can get ugly.
3) The other player/team gets a chance to slide the beer can across the table.
This is a fast-moving game. Generally the can is slid every 5 seconds or so. You also consume a good amount of beer in not much time, so 30 mins or so of this game makes for a great pre-party activity. If 4 players play you can slide either one or two cans at a time. An expert variation is to play with bottles...just make sure you have a soft floor in this case.
The rules:
1) Players alternate sliding full beer cans back and forth across the table.
2) 3 possible outcomes occur:
a. The beer can falls short. Nothing happens.
b. The beer can falls over the edge. The other player must CATCH IT (this takes minimal coordination, but you'd be surprised how clumsy some people are). If you don't catch it, someone will probably have beer explode in his/her face later.
c. The beer can hangs over the edge. That is, if you get under the edge and can see can bottom, it counts. In this case, the other player must DRINK IT. All of it. Then get a new beer can to play with.
NOTE: The drinking player must open the can no more than one foot from his/her face. If the can has been dropped, the explosion can get ugly.
3) The other player/team gets a chance to slide the beer can across the table.
This is a fast-moving game. Generally the can is slid every 5 seconds or so. You also consume a good amount of beer in not much time, so 30 mins or so of this game makes for a great pre-party activity. If 4 players play you can slide either one or two cans at a time. An expert variation is to play with bottles...just make sure you have a soft floor in this case.
Ebenezer was a beirut champion in college back in the 1940's. Now he's lost his shooting touch, but his shufflebeer skills have made him the talk of the retirement home and have had Mildred, Ethel, and Agatha wanting to get all up in his Depends.
by Nicholas D January 31, 2007
Get the shufflebeer mug.Catherine Ocean was no stranger to the sausage bin, but when the jocks caught on to the the fact that she had over seven STDs displayed prominently on her face and started turning her down, she got depressed and became no stranger to the biscuit tin.
by Nicholas D May 16, 2004
Get the no stranger to the sausage bin mug.An stronger form of beat it up. While beating it up means having intercourse with a woman, beating it uuuuup means really going at it like crazy or doing it multiple times. The more you drag out the "u" in "up," the more vigorous and/or repeated you are trying to say that the act was. Further emphasis can be added by sticking your tongue out during the "uuuuu" part.
Situation: Steve's little sister, Tammy, is a high school senior considering attending a college 500 miles from where Steve's family lives. Steve's friend from high school, Josh, is currently a junior at that college. Steve thought it would be a good idea for Josh to show Tammy around and introduce her to some people during her visit to the school.
Steve: "How did everything go with Tammy? It sounds like she had a great time."
Josh: "She sure as hell did! First I showed her around campus and introduced her to some of my friends. Then we went out to a bar and had a bunch of shots. After that I took it back to my place and I beat it up. Sorry dude."
Steve: "How could you, man? That's really disrespectful. Oh well, I'll get over it. We still on for South Padre for spring break?"
Josh: "Fo' shizzle my nizzle."
Alternatively:
Steve: "How did everything go with Tammy? It sounds like she had a great time."
Josh: "She sure as hell did! First I showed her around campus and introduced her to some of my friends. Then we went out to a bar and had a bunch of shots. After that I took it back to my place and I beat it uuuuup! Skeet skeet! Sorry dude."
Steve: "WHAAAAT!?!?!? You motherfucking son of a bitch! That's my little sister! I'm going to kill you!!!"
Steve: "How did everything go with Tammy? It sounds like she had a great time."
Josh: "She sure as hell did! First I showed her around campus and introduced her to some of my friends. Then we went out to a bar and had a bunch of shots. After that I took it back to my place and I beat it up. Sorry dude."
Steve: "How could you, man? That's really disrespectful. Oh well, I'll get over it. We still on for South Padre for spring break?"
Josh: "Fo' shizzle my nizzle."
Alternatively:
Steve: "How did everything go with Tammy? It sounds like she had a great time."
Josh: "She sure as hell did! First I showed her around campus and introduced her to some of my friends. Then we went out to a bar and had a bunch of shots. After that I took it back to my place and I beat it uuuuup! Skeet skeet! Sorry dude."
Steve: "WHAAAAT!?!?!? You motherfucking son of a bitch! That's my little sister! I'm going to kill you!!!"
by Nicholas D March 10, 2010
Get the beat it uuuuup mug.