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mrkapper's definitions

chair

noun: a platform for sitting on. Usually consists of hard, sturdy legs and a cushioned platform with lumbar support.

verb: To use a chair (see above) to deliver a beating or severely hurt someone. Usually, threats involving chairs are used by wannabe gangsters as a means to intimidate others.
noun:
What a comfy chair...I could play CS on this all day...

verb:
1: What the **** are you looking at?
2: (begins explaining that he means no harm, tries to calm (1) down)
1: SHUT UP OR I'LL CHAIR YA!
2: Ok.
1: NAH, SHUT THE **** UP OR I'LL CHAIR YA RIGHT NOW!
by MrKapper June 30, 2007
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Hugo Boss

Every man's best friend when trying to impress a woman.
1: So, how about you and I?
2: Get bent, douchebag.
1: I see. Allow me to introduce my friend. His name is Boss. Hugo Boss. *leans over*
2: I love you. Let's fuck.
by MrKapper July 11, 2006
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to have a roo loose in the top paddock

An Australian colloquialism; describing someone intellectually impaired or moronic.
In the case of this phrase, the term "roo" is an abbreviation for kangaroo, an Australian marsupial.

Used emphatically, the phrase is sometimes amended to "a few roos loose in the top paddock".
To have a roo loose in the top paddock:

After John spent all those years on weed, he talked liked he had a roo loose in the top paddock.
by MrKapper July 10, 2006
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Not know whether one is Arthur or Martha

An Australian colloquialism; to be in a state of confusion.
Often used in a threatening or otherwise negative context.
To not know whether one is Arthur or Martha

If that bloke goes anywhere near my girl, I'll bash him so hard he won't know if he's Arthur or Martha!
by MrKapper July 9, 2006
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the apple never falls far from the tree

Statement made to infer that one is invariably similar to their parents. Often used negatively or ironically.
1: I heard that Jake is on drugs.
2: Yeah, so was his dad.
1: Hmmm...the apple never falls far from the tree.

1: Stacy's Mom is teh shizzle.
2: Have you seen Stacy? The apple never falls far from the tree.....

1: You filthy little scoundrel, just like your father!
2: I'm nothing like my father!!!
1: The apple never falls far from the tree!
by MrKapper December 3, 2005
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methinks

Derived from "I think" and possibly fuelled by Star Wars: Episode I, The Phantom Menace, "methinks" is a term added to a sentence to express opinion.

Can be used at any point in the sentence, thus adding a flexibility advantage over "I think". However, owing to its poor continuity with formal English, it is often suggestive of idiocy.
1: Your friend is a foolish one, methinks.
1: Methinks you are wrong.

1: Jane is HOT, methinks!!
2: Methinks is a stupid word, methinks.
by MrKapper December 28, 2005
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choc knob

n.

A penis freshly removed from an anus, either male or female. Derived from imagery all too obvious to require explanation here.

v.

To insert said choc knob into the mouth of sodomised partner; hence said partner is "choc-knobbed".
1: "Oh gross, wash that thing before you put it in my mouth!"
2: (inserts into mouth) "Choc knob, bitch."
by MrKapper July 11, 2006
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